It’s Halloween Week at Savage Chickens! And here’s the annual contest! Just complete this cartoon and you could win Savage Chickens stuff!
– First prize: a t-shirt and a mug
– Second prize: a t-shirt
– Third prize: a mug
To enter, just tell me what the chicken is saying in the above cartoon. You can add your entry (or entries) to the comments, or send it to me via my contact form. Winners will be announced on Halloween!!
And here’s more Halloween fun!
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“No, no, no! Don’t cross that road, he’s waiting on the other side!!”
Can’t we just watch ‘Mary Poppins’ again instead?
You know, Boris Karloff WAS that scarey.
Saw V? They just don’t make them like they used too.
I hear there’s a Nightmare On Wallstreet?
“Discovery Channel” – Look, even if chickens could fly, we two wouldn’t have managed this close formation.
You know, that movie franchise has been done to death
Can you please change the channel for me? Ive gone thru like 63 remotes after i got those blades attached to my fingers. Its really annoying.
Switch that soap for me, would’ya? it’s the third remote that I trash tonite…
Ya know, you’re way prettier in real life.
I am *so* dressing up as Pinhead this year!
“Need a haircut?”
That McCain-guy’s facemask… it’s SCARY!
CO2 causes global warming!? Aaaaaaa!!!
“Good debate, but honestly, that Palin chick SCARES me”
“‘2½ Men’? What a deceptive title. NOBODY on this show has been chopped in half.”
“That Dexter dude’s a wimp, don’t you agree?”
“That’s not real horror! It’s just long drawn-out scenes of torture with excessive gore. Can we watch something else than CNBC?”
“Dammit, I disemboweled her like 10 years ago. Now she has a primetime series and I don’t?”
Great, now i’m going to have nightmares, dang Presidential election
“they just don’t make costume friendly psychopaths anymore. i mean.. dexter? jigsaw? how the hell is that supposed to make a good halloween costume? those were the days, man… those were the days.”
“Hey, what do you think about me going as Sarah Palin this year?”
frankly, my clawnails could really need a cut
“You were right, CNN election coverage is pretty horrifying.”
Come on! That’s totally CG.
Admit it. My claws have their uses except bloody murder and mutilation. At least with the remote lost.
It’s probably best if you turn it on. You saw what I did to the remote.
Holly Crap… I’m a turkey!
What?! They make us look like the bad guys!
God! I can’t stand it! How many of these movies are there? And they’ve never once gotten my hair right!
the world is getting scarier and scarier each year…
Cloris Leachman on “Dancing with the Stars? Now THAT’S scary!
Hey, we’re on the 10 Most Wanted!!! Uhhhuuuulll!!
“Your hand had better not be where I think it is…”
You think anyone will scare like a chicken?
Either YOU change the channel or we only have a one to two chance to watch Pokemon on time.
“Y’know, I hate seeing myself on screen and I never usually watch my own movies”
That Rachel Ray is SCAR-EE!
“Why they can’t just run away?”
“I don’t know, what would you like to dress up as for Halloween this year?”
I’m not sure which is more ironic, a chicken dressed as a butcher or a chicken wearing a mask designed to protect teeth.
“I wonder what a sliced Simon Cowell tastes like”
“Costumes and masks are now way out of fashion.”
Freddy and Jason after analyzing the Saw series.
Where do they come up with this stuff?!? So unrealistic!
I told you Tom Cruise was on Oprah again today!
You know, Reality Television is a lot more terrifying than any nightmare we could come up with!
All this Christmas advertising makes me want to kill!
“DING DONG” Oh No!! I hope it’s not Bill Shatner again, he scares me!
Who needs a remote control when you’re claw-nailed?
Revenge of the Night Poodles! My favorite!
NNNNNoooooooooo…Not a Martha Stewart and Rachel Ray Holiday special…I won’t sleep for weeks!!!
why do they always run up the stairs?
Those Gilmore Girls give me the hebbie gebbies!
… my ass looks so damn fat in this scene!
Hey! How did they get our homevideos!
Hello. My idea is the following:
– Title: “Lucky 13”
– and the chicken is saying:
“Definitely Saw XIII is better than Friday the 13th..”
What? I can’t believe those jerks got Abe Lincoln to advertise that Rozerem stuff. I should be all over that. I’m calling my agent!
“You know Jason, I believe a close examination of the subtext suggests that the auteur is utilizing genre rules to criticize the genre itself.”
“Should we turn it on?”
“That was gruesome. What a terrible waste of ketchup.
“I can’t watch. It’s Col. Sanders!”
This next slide is when I killed a whole dorm in Florida. That was a “dream” vacation.
The following year…
“It’s the sequel – Col. Sanders meets Popeye.”
“We’re all gonna die! It’s the Chick-Fil-A Cows movie!”
SCARY!!!! High School Musical is on again.
I love the election coverage on CNN.
OOH! Santa Claus is Coming to Town is on!
This election is scarrier then anything we could possibly do.
We gotta stop watching the news. WAY too scary.
“… to see a man lay bricks. I don’t get it.”
This network news channel is going to give me nightmares.
I knew we shouldn’t have leaked those home videos!
Y’know, that guy in Friday the 13th looks alot like you…hheeeyyy, waaiitt a minute…it IS you!
“That Colonel sure gives me the willies.”
It slices?! It dices!? That was my line! You’re dead RON POPEIL…dead!!
New LCD screens makes these actors look so real I’m afraid scratching it.
Man… I can’t believe you never told Godzilla his zipper was showing! Classic!!
Who knew doily making could be so hard.
The camera really DOES add ten pounds.
“Tsk, why do they ALWAYS split up…”
Why are your pupils white and mine are black?
I love these new steel pin feathers!
“You’re so wrong Han, parsec is a distance unit”
“What happened? I fell asleep…”
Those Hills kids scare the bejesus out of me…diddo!!!
Don’t you just hate when they keep remaking the same Horror flick over and over again! Just ruins the whole suspense!
Horror movies are so predictable these days…
ooh! and here’s the part where you stab me with my own arm, which you just tore off.
Why does Michael Myers get all the airtime this time of year?
There’s nothing on but violence!
Well, I think the Iron Chef’s use of the chicken gizzard secret ingredent in that dessert dish is just mesmerizing, don’t you dear?
I can’t believe we’re missing trick or treating for Dick Clark’s Hallows Rockin’ Eve!
“You know, that Sarah Palin scares me to death”
Wow, they sell a stainless steel Chef knive with sharpener. Should we buy one and share?
elections! that’s scary
And now, because of a momentary lapse in the bathroom, I can never have children.
“Damn, I’d be tempted too”
“I always cry when he says, “Frankly, my dear, I don’t give a damn.”
They never get your hair right in these made for TV movies.
Don’t you find using an axe is messy?
“Alien versus Predator ? What a stupid mix”
“Man, you know this economy’s bad when WE can’t even find work”
Having claws avoid ghosting reception problems.
Tuning yout TV is much better when you’re antenna-handed.
“Luk, I am yourrr fatherrr… Why my agent never gets me such interesting evil characters like this ?”
You get the legs, I get the breasts…hey wait…what am I saying? That’s even too creepy for me!”
No, I can’t use the remote. But now I can reach the set controls from my seat!
“This reality TV is pretty terrifying”
Just think how scary it will be once we get HDTV
Will this foul, terrifying campaign never end?
I didn’t know the mask had the “3D” built-in!
“He’s right behind you, Laurie!”
Stupid V-chip… *now* what are we supposed to watch?
“Oh no, it’s Halloween again. 364 days is just not enough”
You call those talking points? I’ll give you some points to ponder mister reporter.
“You call that a chicken wing ? THIS is a wing”
“You call that a chicken wing ? THIS is a chicken wing”
Saw V? They should’ve stopped after Saw III.
Hey, look! Alien and Predator have become friends too!
We aren’t nearly as scary broken up by commercials.
42 channels – and there’s Poltergeists on all them.
Actually, these claws give surprisingly good reception on the TV-set!
Staying home and Hallo-Wii’ing was a great idea!
Regis Philbin–now THAT’s a scary costume.
I don’t really like the News.. they make you and me look boring!
…I dunno, What do you wanna do tonight?
“This Edward Scissorhands is so inexpressive. He looks just like you”
CUT! CUT! Man, anda they call Hitchcock master of the terror.
“Edward Scissorhands ? You’re so sued Tim Burton !”
“‘Girl’s Gone Wild?’ Time to come out of retirement, my friend.”
“You’re right, the verticle stripes make my butt look HUGE.”
“Ooo, write that down for me! 1-888-PSORIASIS.”
You never want to go out anymore. All we do is watch TV.
OMG!! look!!! everybody want’s to guess what we are saying… OMG!! they are looking at us!!
Omen V: The Rule of President Obama – if I watch this I’ll have nightmares!
“Ah, another pleasant evening watching De-Skin-emax”
If we order within the next 10 minutes, we’ll get a full set of Ginsu knives and a chopping board, all for the low price of $19.95!
Seriously! My knife skills beat Emeril’s anyday!
… and watch- now he’ll change his shoes and put on a sweater. This guy creeps me out.
Who needs a converter box when you have a built in antenna?
I have to go to the bathroom and I think I’m gonna need some help.
you mean you haven’t had
a manicure ever???
Come on Jason. Cant we watch something other than hockey?
I told you if we dressed up as The Foster Farms Chickens we’d get on TV!
You know.. killing the cable guy wasn´t such a good idea
ok, final one 😛
You know.. killing the cable guy wasn´t a very good idea
So, third date huh?
Ugh. This HDTV shows every bursting blood vessel on me.
“I hate watching the news. All that violence and gore!”
“That noise outside was just stockbrokers going through our trash. I was worried it was Bernanke for a minute there.”
“Digital TV is horrifying. I had no idea my skin looked so bad!”
We could do a lot of good if we could get onto these reality shows.
“Do you think my chest-hair is gross ?”
Man, there’s nothing on TV tonight … let’s go out and get some candy!
Why do they always insist on going in the dark creepy rooms when they hear a noise? Nothing good ever comes of that.
-I hate those remakes Make me look fat-
We sure showed HIM a new meaning of “Director’s Cut”.
Okay, your movie is next. This time, we do a shot when you bash in the door or wall the person you’re after is leaning against!
900 channels and we’re not on ANY of them tonight?
Wow. You are really slow. How could you have let them get away?
OMG!! Did you really kill that Girl??
Damn Man!!, your so good!!!
I think we should try out for Survivor.
Oh great, the powers out. Can you go check the fusebox?
Great. Static. Now I’ll never see that Samara chick again.
Becoming Paris Hilton’s new BFF? Now THAT’S scary.
“But I don’t want to watch ice hockey!”
This dude in ‘The Burning’ makes us both look like pussies.
Take off that mask! I can’t understand a word you say!
Your not fat the camera adds 5 lbs.
“We really are in hell.”
Oh Boy! “It’s the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown” is on!!
Hey, I know this one! What is “alektorophobia?”
No, I won’t scratch your back. Stop asking.
Cover your eyes! It’s a Kentucky Fried Chicken commercial!
TV on the news: “…and another bank has filed for bankruptcy…”
Chicken: “So how come no one told us Halloween would be anticipated this year?”
Halloween, Halloween II, Halloween Resurrection, why is it always about you?
“Not another Chick Flick”
My exfoliating mask is almost dry, how is yours coming?
Wow, they’re showing “It’s A Wonderful Life” really early this year.
For the last time, I know the swimsuit competition is over; I just like the way the fabric breathes.
Everyone talks about how scary the news is…I dunno though, Highschool Musical and the fifth in the Saw series are the only real competetors. Next to us that is.
“every year, same sh** on TV…”
Yikes! Palin is one heart-beat away from the Presidency…now that’s scary!!!
a guy gave me candy for no reason
I’m losing popularity to sheep costumes
Back in the good old days horror movies were more than just campaign ads.
I have a couple ideas. Sorry if I’ve repeated anyone else’s ideas; I didn’t read the previous comments. I appologize for all the minds scarred by the Cialis line.
I’m sick of all these stores saying they’ve slashed their prices!
I wanna be the next Dr. 90210! When are they holding auditions again?
Edward Scissorhands really didn’t take advantage of his situation.
Good thing the elections are coming up. All that ballot slashing will really help us pay the rent.
For the last time, I don’t care what the commercials say. You DON’T NEED Cialis!
By the time the new year comes around, the gardening job story will still work. They’ll be happy to see that Bush gone.
What do you mean you dropped the remote in our pool of blood? Don’t tell me it’s near the diving board!
“It’s true. You CAN find a rerun of “It’s A Wonderful Life” at any time of day on Cable.”
Maybe we can host our own game show– “Run really fast or Die”!
“Look honey, they’re playing our show.”
Nothing but re-runs all day of Friday the 13th. This is killing me!
I don’t know about you but the Parent Trap really creeps me out.
Actually, Julie Andrews terrifies me…
Edward Scissorhands the greatest story ever told!
Wow, the camera does add 20 pounds.
I told you doing a movie together would only further our type-casting.
“Alien Vs Predator? Oh come on! Cross-overs are ridiculous !”
Wow, those Republican candidates give me the willies!
it’s boring waiting for halloween. want me to turn on the tv?
i swear i just saw the ring.
“So do you understand the emotion I was trying to portray? I just wanted to audience to feel beyond scared and wet themselves.”
“Oh no… cable is out, so i think we’ll have to go on trick or treating”
“I got this blades from that infomertial”
“This edward Scissorhands think he’s the big thing, look at my blades”
“think i need to get modernised, i’ll change this blades for that chainsaw showing in TV”
No way unwrapping these halloween candies, may I peel them?
Aw come on, don’t be such a ch…… Um, never mind!
So do you think I would look good with a French manicure?
“Trick or treatment, Jason?”
If Pinhead and Swamp Thing had a love child, would it have gills?
i dont have 1 but i’ll cast a vote to the “i hear there’s a nightmare on wallstreet” lmao
“Can you believe how scary this Girls Gone Wild thing is?”
[…] It wouldn’t be Halloween without Savage Chicken’s Annual Halloween Caption Contest. […]
So… I heard Sarah Palin is a hockey mom. Any relation?
You like Palin for being a hockey mom, but I appreciate McCain’s scary tax cuts for the rich.
I love Oprah!
“No Deal”? She’s crazy.
AH! the sound of music! turn it off! turn it off!
and they thought I was scary…
“Why is he killing her?”
“I like Obama. We should take care that he wins.”
“You know actually I don’t really like killing people. It’s just Halloween that I can’t stand”
Pssst, he’s not dead yet, the mass serial killer never dies the first time you kill him.
Fred and Jay-bo after a night of mayhem.
My word, you might want to cover up those eyeholes of yours.
God, I wish these claws were long enough to reach that button.
Friday the 31st? I thought it was 13.
I thought reality TV means I can butcher all these nice people from the comfort of my sofa.
“In your dreams!”
“Horror just isn’t the same anymore…”
“Since when is horror supposed to be funny?”
Over the bubble: The title of the movie with that lonely gardener robot with scissors for hands whose creator died before installing him real hands (i forgot).
In the bubble: “Now that’s a character i can relate to” or something that shows compassion (or even anger “What a rip-off!”)
Think I’d qualify for fencing at the paralympics?
Gee! The witch has put poor Hansel in the hoven!
I wish I had hair like that!
Don’t forget we are having dinner with your folks tomorrow. I do hope it’s not spaghetti again!
You first, Ginger or Mary Ann
“I hate violence on TV”.
I’ve got our airline tickets to that island. I hope they’re ready to rename the show “No Survivors”!
When will we see Sadako crawl out of the TV?
(need to draw an arrow going downward on the TV.) “I told you we would scare more people if we dressed like stockbrokers!”
I have to call my Lawyer. Look at Cloris Leachman in that hat, its total copy right infringment. I gonna sue the pants off Dancing with the Stars.
Do you think those Ginsu knives would be better? And they come with a free ‘vegetable’ dicer!
“Do these stripes make me look fat?”
“This is such an inaccurate representation of us.”
“We should sue this director for defamation of character?”
(Psychopath Retirement Home) “Those were the days.”
“I’m telling you, Jason, the Food Network’s WAY scarier than this unrealistic crap… just think of the way they slice and dice those chickens!”
“The nerve of these directors… I have 9 stripes on my shirt, not 12! Them and their artistic license…”
“Aww, look at the cute little trick-or-treaters… makes me just wanna run up behind them and give them a great big bear hug!”
“I’m sick of all this election stuff. How about you take Obama, I’ll take McCain, and we’ll call it a day?”
“THAT’S more like it, Johnny! From cutting hair to cutting heads – see why I love this guy, Jason?”
why people dress up like chickens on halloween is beyond me.
Frankly both candidates scare the Bejeebus out of me.
“Eh, you tricked me, that’s not M.A.S.H, that’s M.A.S.K.”
“… and this one can launch rockets. That’s why you’ll never be M.A.S.K”
“what’s for dinner ?”
See? Every station: “Poultry-Geist”!
I can’t believe Michael gets to do Letterman just because it’s “Halloween”!
Have you tried using the ears from REAL rabbits? Works much better.
The book was better.
“I once went to E.R … for nose picking”
Wow! The nicer slicer dicer from JML
That could save us a whole heap of hassle
Oohhh…That Colonel Sanders is scary….
“That’s your hockey mom ? No wonder you turned like that”
“Now you will probably want to wait til Christmas to offer this lipstick to your mom”
“check this out: slash slash w w w. It must be some kind of secret message for us … again”
Dude, no way!! Dick Cheney is WAY scarier than Lon Chaney!!
I’d hide my face too if I’d forgotten to get the $40 coupon to get rid of the rabbit ears.
Alright psychopath, where’s the remote? No more butcher knives for you!!
Title: Freddy vs. Jason 2
“Hey, [did you know] we have a new movie coming out November 4th!?”
so..did you think of anything to wear tonight?
“Wow that Crystal Lake sure looks nice…oh sorry.”
“This season on Dancing with the Stars has been a complete horror show.”
Running for president is my day job.
We need a bigger TV.
Friday 13th night and watching TV… I think we’re getting old.
If you ask me to go Trick-or-Treating one more time…
Reality TV shows are far from real!
“When Good Chickens Go Bad”? What is that about?
Ya know, I think I should try this Proactive stuff.
“Hey J, it’s that a horror movie or a video of your mom?”
“Okay, you win. Oprah is still scarier.”
oh no they just made trick or treating leagal
If I have to get up from this TV one more time to answer the door to give some little freak some candy I swear I’m gonna kill somebody!
Wanna watch “The Carebears 3” or “The Smurfs Part V”?
Watching “Freddy make spagetti” on the food channel, just isn’t as fun as it used to be.
Hey J Look it’s the sound of music.
They can’t show graphic violence on TV, but KFC commercials are ok?
just sit there, breathing heavy, ignoring me like usual. i am so tired of this.
“Why so simple, Buddy?”
“Buddy, take that mask off. Seriously, you look like the real guy.”
“And they think Reality TV is a new concept!”
Oh No!! The camera really DOES add 10 pounds!
It’s sad that there’s no more guys like us on TV…
I never thought there would be guys scarier than us on TV…
Is it so gosh darn hard for those people to get my hair right?
Where did you say you had an itch?
“Look! You see? It’s not just the mask, you have to wear pants too”
“Ohh Poultrygeist is on”
TV’s so violent nowadays. It’s really sickening, you know?
Aaaah, here’s Johnny!
Oooooo, the ultimate horror… another infomercial!
How it all started
Nothing’s on, what do you want to do now?
You’re right, “Fool’s Gold” is some scary stuff.
How do you always catch up to them when you never run?
So that’s where Michael Myers is now!
Looking at a dead television just isn’t the same.
Not Tom Cruise!! That guy gives me nightmares!
Yo My Name Is Robert England & Yo Better Hide Cuz
Yo About To Get Knifed!!
i made urine inside of my pants
I really miss those Ginsu Knives infomercials!
They should move Halloween to Nov.4 this year.
Sweeeet! A ‘Golden Girls’ marathon.
Who would have thought that ‘The best of Mike Myers’ would be from SNL and not the Halloween movies. Bummer.
Mother, stop looking out the window and come over here. The movie is about to start.
That Chris Rock guy is so funny, he cuts me up everytime I watch him.
Take off that mask, I told you already that we’re watching a horror movie, not the hockey game.
Wow, that Wil Wheaton guest spot on ‘Criminal Minds’ really was creepy. I don’t think I’m gonna sleep well tonight.
Do you think that is one of the RNC’s designer dresses or one of Sarah’s used ones?
See! She is an environmentalist! That is one of her recycled dresses!
Good thing you got that tv fixed. You know that no TV and no beer make me go something something…
Geez, not Alien Versus Preadtor AGAIN!
Hey Look! It’s that Lifetime story about how we met and fell in love!
Geez the Je Biden guy is like a zombie…wait….that’s just John McCain.
I can’t take any more of this fear mongering!
“That Billy Mays is really creapy! He is always trying to rub me with his super shammy!”
“Do you see? This is why we are in therapy! You never wanna kill for fun anymore!”
“…And that is why you never mix electricity and water!”
Freddy: “Hmmm…maybe it’s time I try Proactiv at it’s low introductory price of $19.99 or I may end up having to wear a mask like you.”
Is it just me or does the CGI get worse each year?
These “eat more chikin” ads bring out the worst in me.
I could do that movie so much better than these so called “actors”.
“Hey! that’s my ass not the remote!”
>sigh< I was so young in this episode…….
Did you ever consider a career in hockey?
“That guy looks nothing like me, his claws are way too short and his shirt has too many stripes.”
Ok, in that scene, I really think they should’ve used the camera to get my good side, don’t you? What do you mean, I “don’t have a good side”!!??
I don’t care what you say. The Olson twins freak me out a little.”
Hey, dude, that’s YOU in this movie! Can I have your autograph????
Don’t run upstairs!! Don’t run upstairs!!
“Man, Isn’t it ironic our own TV with ghosting reception problems?”
“BUZZ”… Can you get my striped shirt out of the dryer before it shrinks? I just slaughtered a house full of teenagers & my claws are still wet.
Michael Myers sucks!
Mortgage crisis… you see? thats real terror
This is the part when Dr House says.. you’re going to die
Last year movie was better
“Mira que mal doblan las voces para otros países, el terror pierde sentido”
We really need to “get rid” of our agent
Oh I thought of another one . . .
Title: When Market Research Goes Home
Thought Bubble: What we need now is a captive audience.
“Don’t you think the mask is a bit much?”
Just when I thought I was out, they pull me back in
“I want to change channels too, but do you know how hard it is to operate the remote with these things!”
“Oh no! Not Edward Scissorhands again!”
…And they call me and you an Obama-nation?
“Ya, “The Simpsons” really sold out after “Treehouse of Horror IX”.”
You know, when I bought these knives on TV-shop, they PROMISED me they were Stainless Steel.
“You see, I told ya the million buck buck bucks was in suitcase number 13!”
Johnyy Depp’s Edward Scissorhand is nothing compared to me: Chicken Wingblades.
A Scary Halloween Party
“I can’t believe nobody showed up to our Halloween Party!”
Dude…you just sat on my other spikes!
title : Hannah Montana
‘Now that is one crap your pants scary costume!’
Dude,what does Chef Ramsey have that i don’t? is it the accent?
This Poultrygeist eggstravaganza is down right fowl.
Titel: auditions suck
Text: Can you believe they chose Hugh Jackman with fake claws over me?
“That Tom Cruise REALLY creeps me out!!”
I would rather watch TV alone in the dark.
Title: Remote control envey
“It’s all reruns, anyway.”
“Do you have to wear that stupid mask every time we watch a hockey game?”
Gosh, Bob Campbell should run for President!
These Halloween movies just don’t scare me like they used to.
Look at Michaels knife skills since he went to culinary school.
“These soap operas are just too frightening these days! Look at them kissing!”
I’m not sure how much I like “Dr.Phill-kenstien.” Young Philkenstein might be okay, though, if Mel Brooks was in it.
Sweet, The Matrix is on!
That Brenda sure is hot!
“I was only trying to return her keys. All these scenes are out of context.”
[…] Here are the winners of this year’s Halloween Contest! […]
Sure, Jennifer Aniston is good, but no one does a romantic comedy like Sandra Bullock.
You know if I joined the army there’d be no reason to keep all of those other troops in Iraq.
Can you imagine the movie Rat Race with psychopathic killers instead of the original contestans? I’d keep Mr. Bean though.
I scratch your back you scratch mine?