Neighbor Noise

A handy tool for apartment dwellers. Drawn on two 3″ x 5″ sticky notes to make a big 3″ x 10″ cartoon.

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54 Responses to Neighbor Noise

  1. Di says:

    Oh, this is awesome. You even included whistling. Thank you.

  2. Evan says:

    Thank goodness there is no ‘sex’ box! Cuz everybody knows, “you can be as loud as the hell you want when you’re makin’ love.” 😀

  3. Hansi says:

    You forgot “loud sex”?!

  4. BigLee says:

    You missed out Heavy Petting and Screaming “OMG OMG OMG” at three in the morning.

  5. Ant says:

    How about whining like a horse? I guess it could fit under donkey.

  6. Nicole says:

    I especially love “slithering”!

    And I suppose you want to keep this SFW, otherwise you would have mentioned The Sound We Do Not Talk About – I know from experience how annoying those can be!

    Looking for my bongos and the pogo stick now… 😀

  7. Sam Juan says:

    I’m guessing this was either a request from a fan or was created out of Doug’s necessity. Either way, we all benefit! Thanks!

  8. Kelly says:

    LOLOLOLOLOLOLOL!!!!! Are you spying on me? This covers my noisy neighbors!!!! 😀

  9. cholling says:

    Noisy sex isn’t on the list? I guess my neighbors need a write-in.

  10. Snard says:

    What? No separate entry for “Loud sex”?

  11. Branagh says:

    An ex-neighbor complained about my son who was then a very active toddler …
    The same neighbor played Tina Turner on full blast for hours every time their soccer team won a final cup game …
    And sometimes when they were late back from the pub, their dog would whine for hours …
    And she had a voice that could be heard 5 blocks away …

  12. lindylu says:

    It’s the neighbors farting that keeps me awake at night.

  13. JaneC says:

    There’s no option for, erm, “noises that make the children ask questions we’re not ready to answer.” Perhaps that euphemism is too long for a check list.

  14. Rachel says:

    Other: Yelling at your children to get in the car for 5 minutes!!

  15. Odalie says:

    I love the whole list! Hehe!
    Several years ago, I lived in an apartment and my upstairs neighbor (whom I love dearly) would sing and play his guitar in the bathroom at all hours of the day and night. Great accoustics from what he told me…

  16. Martin says:

    Ohh that would come in handy, if the walls around here didn’t transmit noises through most of the building. So if I posted that on the neighbors door, and write “Drilling holes with a drill hammer” at “Other”, I could well bark up the wrong tree.

  17. Natakue says:

    This is great! But you did forget “dropping bags of marbles” or “rolling bowling balls” for the upstairs neighbors.

    I have no idea what goes on upstairs…

  18. Dave says:

    Doug, right on the nail! All I need now is a pre-printed pad of these 😉

  19. dt says:

    Do you have any idea how much I didn’t want Air Supply stuck in my head all day? Now I have to kill myself. Thank you so very much.

  20. Karina says:

    You have no idea how hard this applies to my neighbor right now. You forgot loud sexual noises.

  21. Hybridcattt says:

    There’s no ‘loud yawning’! My neighbor do it.

  22. Dere says:

    You apparently don’t live in the suburbs. =) You forgot leaf blower, snow blower, and motorcycle.

  23. kristina says:

    Love that you have walking in high heels! Now I only have to add “while doing dishes at 11:30 PM”…

    I second dt on having Air Supply stuck in my head all day long… thanks!

  24. kristina says:

    Oh, and I second Dave too – a pre-printed pad of these must hit the Cafepress!

  25. Required says:

    I’ll have you know that my bagpipes are legitimate self-defense against Mexican Polka music at 3 a.m. You’ll have to pry my chanter from my cold, dead hands.

  26. Aviatrix says:

    Other than the glaring omission pointed out in numerous other comments, my concern about this list is that an ambitious neighbour might perceive it as a checklist of accomplishment.

  27. StrangeRover says:

    Leaf blower, pressure washer, leaf blower again, tile cutter, leaf blower, pressure washer, air compressor for some other reason, jackhammer. I’m not kidding. Every freeking day for the past 10 months. What the hell is wrong with these people?

  28. Walterman says:

    … sounds like some chickens live in an apartment building.

  29. Evelien says:

    This is great! I put one on my boss’ door and added ‘playing darts’. Because, you know, he plays darts all day.

  30. Erok says:

    Yes! No Vuvuzela. Bagpipes are OK, though…

  31. Jürgen says:

    I second Evan, though I don’t live in an avenue named after any letter of the alphabet.

    -Does the particular mentioning of bagpipes mean they’re not considered a musical instrument?
    I protest! Just listen to what beautiful use they’ve been put by AC/DC so many years ago!
    Wait, my neighbour’s ringing – I can’t concentrate on the lyrics of Oasis’ “Wonderwall” with that noise…

  32. Kathleen says:

    I love this one! I am bummed that I don’t have noisy neighbors to share it with.
    Chickens are the quiet neighbors For a short time I had three roosters in my apartment and they where much quieter than the neighbors. Plus they sound so much better than all the other mentioned noises!

  33. Ian says:

    You also forgot “temper-tantrum induced crying”, which my neighbours kids do at least once per day.

  34. The Little Myrmidon says:

    Hey! I like bagpipes. (starts humming “Scotland the Brave” quietly to self.)

  35. Moss says:

    Can I please have a 100-piece block of these, please? Please please please PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE?!

  36. Twyla says:

    I think “boinking” would have been an acceptable, family friendly word for the missing one. Hammering happens a lot here. I think the place on top of us is under construction.

  37. Lesley says:

    Love the cartoon today. Must add babies crying, yelling, whining etc. to the list!

  38. willwot says:

    Other: Squeeky Office Chair that needs to get oiled.

  39. Tacens says:

    This made me laugh/cry inside. My landlord/neighbor actually started learning the bagpipes last week. Doug, please send some Zombie Chickens to eat his brain and make my agony stop!!

  40. NOOO! says:

    Someone around me has a vuvuzela. It’s pretty terrible. And the worst part is, I don’t know who.

  41. steve says:

    slithering… superb.

    : )

  42. Lize says:

    You forgot “Making smelly cheap curry…”

    THAT’S the worst! But other than that, spot on…

    Thanks for this! 🙂

  43. stephanie says:

    i LOVE your cartoons. They are all soooo true ! Thanks for making me laugh all the time ! Greetings from belgium

  44. GL says:

    -Gun fire (big caliber)
    -Sex noises unless nothing on TV
    -Hostage pleas for mercy outside working hours
    -Satanic chanting
    -Ghostly whispers
    -Resonator Sea shanties (in shower)

  45. Earbashed says:

    I am definitely sticking this through my noisy neighbour’s door

  46. neworleans4ever says:

    No, Lize, smells require a whole other cartoon! Doug?

  47. Mike says:

    Reading this to the sound of my neighbours right now and I’m extremely tempted

  48. Erin says:

    Note: next time please add a box for “no kids screaming at all hours of the night”! Other than that, you gave me the perfect note to post on my neighbor’s door! Thanks!

  49. Dan W says:

    Can you make one for your work neighbors? I would love to post something like this on my co-workers’ cubes!

  50. Pete Bogs says:

    Loudly coughing up phlegm is common among my neighbors.

  51. Louie says:

    I just used it with my upstairs neighbors… How about now you make one to apologize with the neighbors, maybe something like “I didn’t want to be a douche…”

  52. Alice says:

    I’ve just rediscovered this after being woken up early – this made me happy and slightly more forgiving! But can we please have one of these for roommates that don’t know how to wash up too? 🙂

  53. Nix says:

    Also missing is Dance Dance Revolution. You do NOT want to live downstairs from that. Good thing there is an “Other” box!

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