Savage Chickens Halloween Contest!

What is the chicken saying? You tell me. The funniest suggestion wins a FREE Savage Chickens t-shirt featuring a cartoon from the site.

Update: Winners announced!

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239 Responses to Halloween Contest

  1. Fourwall Jackson says:

    “You shouldn’t watch so much TV.”

  2. brena says:

    bird flu protection?

  3. brena says:

    You did what with its legs?

  4. Franco says:

    err..being a chicken or a pumpkin doesn’t save you from anything…both makes good soup.

  5. Codepope says:

    “And for the full effect, set fire to your head”

  6. doninstatesville says:

    I’m sorry… I’m all out of candy corn. Would you like a piece of fruit?

  7. Clair says:

    Hmm…there’s something different about you. Have you had a haircut?

  8. onehugeeye says:

    right now I’m feeling a terrible urge to bite your head off

  9. Bookworm says:

    oh, not the funky chicken again!

  10. The Muse says:

    Have you lost your head?

  11. pjc823 says:

    Is that your face or did your neck throw up?

  12. stace says:

    It’s a good look for you.

  13. darkstar214 says:

    You’re just asking to become a pie, aren’t you?

  14. fern246 says:

    “You STILL don’t know Jack”

  15. Laurence says:

    “I have cancer, Joe.”

  16. =)Bnpositive says:


  17. Teresa says:

    “Where do you put the candle?”

  18. chris says:

    theres something different about you today…………..

  19. micedwhale says:

    Shouldn’t you be running around… sort of like a chicken with his head… Well you get the gist

  20. aurora says:

    Dude, you should really stay out of Sleepy Hollow on Halloween.

  21. chris says:

    thought that wouldn’t happen ’till after midnight?

  22. Peter says:

    Your Easter hat was more … self referential

  23. srg says:

    And they ask why the chicken crossed the road . . . yikes!!!

  24. WhizGidget says:

    I always knew you were a dim bulb

  25. Suze says:

    A bit too much Botox?

  26. Elwood says:

    I hope you carved that BEFORE putting it on…

  27. Peter says:

    I see you’ve decided to dress up as the Donald this year

  28. micedwhale says:

    i hope no one “squashes” my head!

  29. another doug says:

    It’s been done.

  30. tish adams says:

    i don’t know which is scarier: this or your normal costume.

  31. cyberRodent says:

    It’s the great pumpkin Charlie Brown!

  32. cyberRodent says:

    is that a new cologne you’re wearing? no wait .. you got a haircut? no – you lost weight? whatever it is you look smashing!

  33. momof4 says:

    I always thought that there was at least a light in your attic. I see now that I was wrong.

  34. Owen says:

    Keep pecking. I’m not scared yet.

  35. aurora says:

    You should really stay out of Sleepy Hollow.

  36. Joel says:

    And this was a good idea why?

  37. T$ says:

    This “Extreme Makeover” business has really gotten outta hand.

  38. John says:

    “O’Lantern? I didn’t know you were Irish.”

  39. Catt says:

    You’re right Joey, the head-stuck-in-a-turkey routine was much funnier.

  40. Justin Barrett says:

    No, seriously…I want to see your mask.

  41. T$ says:

    You’re ugly and your mother dresses you funny.

  42. CincyRob says:

    Let’s light this candle.

  43. jescoastin says:

    When I look in your eyes, all I see is a hollow shell…

  44. valwalsh says:

    Upset the Headless Horseman again, huh??

  45. Ben says:

    Ha! You did it now pumpkin jerk. Eat your way out, so I can smack you.

  46. Matt says:

    If you mention the Great Pumpkin, I’ll kill you.

  47. capitaltee says:

    Point taken. “Pumpkin” is a stupid term of endearment.

  48. Teresa says:

    “You won’t win Most Original with that.”

  49. jfred says:

    Where did you get that chicken costume?

  50. Sarcasmo says:

    “You’re right, Michael Myers will never know where to find you now.”

  51. mcjaeger68 says:

    You’re getting ready to watch “Its The Great Pumpkin Charlie Brown” tonight aren’t you?

  52. dkgoodman says:

    “A Supreme Court Justice? You?”

    “Yes, is an available domain name.”

    “So your crowing woke the witch doctor. Then what?”

    “No radio station is going to play a band named Smashing Chickens.”

    “No thanks, I don’t want a KFP franchise.”

  53. Brian says:

    How was working with Lance Henriksen?

  54. JaredNathanson says:

    Stop being such a chicken, and let me go get a knife. Its December for God’s sake!!

  55. Cat says:

    You do know they also make pies out of pumpkins…don’t you??

  56. Erika says:

    What’s scary to me about that costume is that I’m thinking you’d make one delicious chicken pot pie.

  57. Jim Rockford says:

    The Witness Protection people have really gotten lazy.

  58. tsbccc says:

    Is that you,Gourd?

  59. SHELLY says:

    How ironic!

  60. Jim Rockford says:

    You have my attention.

  61. Jim Rockford says:

    I hope you don’t think this changes anything between us.

  62. Jim Rockford says:

    This is not the way to feel better about yourself.

  63. Jim Rockford says:

    Internet dating is not for everyone.

  64. The Muse says:

    I agree. We must stand together against the Terror.

  65. Jim Rockford says:

    Autumn colors don’t flatter you.

  66. Jim Rockford says:

    You’re dead to me.

  67. micedwhale says:

    I always though you would go better with nutmeg.

  68. MiMi says:

    …and your point is…?

  69. micedwhale says:

    Orange? On you? That is sooo cock-a-doodle don’t.

  70. Jim Rockford says:

    If you were going for a “Maltese Falcon” look, you failed.

  71. texaslady says:

    “Who are you supposed to be? The Great Pumpkin?”

  72. misterorange says:

    “Okay, it was funny last week. Now it just smells.”

  73. Telemark1 says:

    Are you going as Joan Rivers

  74. geogirl says:

    Somewhere there’s a scarecrow with a tiny chicken head…

  75. Jim Rockford says:

    You’ll die alone and unloved.

  76. Bennu says:

    You’ll do anything for a free t-shirt won’t you?

  77. Redd Capp says:

    Is it me, or have you been getting more sun?

    Of course, you know, this means war!

    Lemme guess. Nothing left at the costume shop?

    So. Any plans for the weekend?

    You really need to start getting more sleep.

    Just pretend you dont know me, okay?

    I think the Terminator costume made you look taller.

    Man, you look like one mean hombre!

  78. Chicken-Lover says:

    I told you sticking your nose in other people’s business would get you in trouble!

  79. Kennedy says:

    You’ve got spinach in your teeth.

  80. Adam says:

    That was my costume idea!

  81. Adam says:

    The other orange meat.

  82. jaysea4 says:

    I warned you about throwing eggs at the garden

  83. Adam says:

    You’ve gone too far, Lenny. You know how my mother died.

  84. Adam says:

    You just had to stick it on your head. I warned you it might not come off!

  85. Adam says:

    You had me at “Hello”.

  86. Adam says:

    Where’d you store your other head?

  87. RCP says:

    Casual friday?

  88. Redd Capp says:

    I just soiled myself. Are you happy now?

  89. niceandfine says:


  90. jaysea4 says:

    I’ve told you before and I’ll tell you again…You’ve got to let those hard to reach seeds go!

  91. Redd Capp says:

    Something I said?

  92. Falling Silently says:

    Hold that thought, I need to get a match.

  93. Redd Capp says:

    Wow! That voodoo stuff works quick!

  94. Flarn Barnsen says:

    Is that 100% cotton?

    What are you so mad about?

    Uhh… proctologist?

    Looks like you didn’t duck in time.

    Are you a chicken going as a Jack-o-lantern or a Jack-o-lantern going as a chicken?

  95. Redd Capp says:

    Yeah, I guess it’s better than that sandwich costume from last year.

  96. hash says:

    Snap about of it! You are chicken! This won’t make you any braver!

  97. -idogcow says:

    The only all-organic costume left down at WholeFoods I take it?

  98. Flarn Barnsen says:

    No, you’ve got the wrong department. You want Complaints … first door on your left.

  99. gosha says:

    Did you annoy the grocery store owner again?

  100. TheGreatTimeWaster says:

    How long and how hard did you think about this?

  101. Flarn Barnsen says:

    What are YOU so mad about?

  102. Catt says:

    What I SAID was “Dude, that bumpkin Arnie’s dead!”

  103. nebulatravel says:

    So, where did you put the candle?

  104. imtrinity123 says:

    I TOLD you to get the seeds out first!

  105. chilly41015 says:

    Let’s hope you don’t run into Peter Peter

  106. chicken cheerleader says:

    AAAAAAAAAAAA! Hey, you’re not Karl Rove!

  107. Flarn Barnsen says:

    I see the plastic surgery didn’t go quite as planned.

  108. Flarn Barnsen says:

    Don’t look at me like that. I TOLD you not to skimp on the cosmetic surgery.

  109. Flarn Barnsen says:

    Look, I’m not helping you get that off. It’s your own fault. That’s what you get for not having arms.

  110. Flarn Barnsen says:

    Ok, but I can tell you right now, the others aren’t going to like it. It goes against that whole “birds of a feather” thing.

  111. Sbyllek says:

    I always knew your head was hollow!

  112. Zandermann says:

    ummm…not really an improvement…but good try!

  113. Steveomatic says:

    “Whats that girl??? Timmy fell down the well???”

  114. rykoch says:

    You’d think with all the readership, we’d get funnier one liners.

  115. Steveomatic says:

    Go Ahead Punk Make My Day

  116. Steveomatic says:

    Ha Ha Chick for Brains

  117. Ada says:

    Oh my God a talking pumpkin!

    I hate to break it to you, but the light in your eyes won’t light up that jack-o-lantern.

    Trying out the latest home-made facial?

  118. dr_washo says:

    “Very authentic…”

    Translation: You are disturbing, I feel a moral obligation to call the police.

  119. chokin' chicken says:

    What the………….? Are you okay Dude?

  120. malliegh says:

    You are far too dim to pull off that jack-o-lantern costume.

    WOW! You REALLY need to lay off the candy corn!

    Don’t panic! Glenda has assured me that at the stroke of midnight, it will turn back into a coach.

    Hey, it’s a good thing you made air holes before you decided to eat the seeds.

  121. onehugeeye says:

    if you are trying to look smarter, you’ve done a pretty good job

  122. Jim Rockford says:

    The gypsy’s curse has come to pass…

  123. Jim Rockford says:

    I’ve never found you more attractive.

  124. Jim Rockford says:

    She’s never coming back, you know.

  125. Jim Rockford says:

    Oh, this is your answer to everything!

  126. Jim Rockford says:

    Is this a commentary on the collapse of social standards and the loss of individuality, or have you been drinking again?

  127. Jim Rockford says:

    No, I don’t think you have a “fear of intimacy.” Why do you ask?

  128. ladyT says:

    “Come on, give Lara Flynn Boyle her head back.”

  129. Jim Rockford says:

    I’ve checked, and your legal options are actually quite limited.

  130. Chris in NF says:

    No, no … wrong bird. It’s Ichabod *Crane*.

  131. chris says:

    attack of the killer lanterns o’jack!

  132. chris says:

    jaaaaaack! i am your trick or treater !

  133. chris says:

    just keepin’ it real?

  134. chris says:

    i’ll get you my poultry……and your little pumpkin too!

  135. chris says:

    lemmee guess………had wife an could’t keep er ? kept her in a punkin shell ? well, you couldn’t have kept her very well!

  136. chris says:

    got a bit of a cranial swell goin’ on there bub?

  137. chris says:

    dude! your face is all swelled up and $#!+

  138. Jim Rockford says:

    Who could love you now?

  139. =)Bnpositive says:

    “Vegan eye for the meat guy?”

  140. Jim Rockford says:

    License and registration, sir.

  141. jfred says:

    Do you think he might have said ‘beware’.

  142. jfred says:

    Don’t worry, it’s barely noticeable.

  143. Jim Rockford says:

    Are you the one they call “El Pumpkino”?

  144. Jim Rockford says:

    You don’t look like the Jacob Marley I remember.

  145. jfred says:

    Sir, I knew the Great Pumpkin. The Great Pumpkin was a friend of mine. Sir, you’re no Great Pumpkin.

  146. Redd Capp says:

    Well, so much for “Intelligent Design”.

  147. Redd Capp says:

    White House? Sure. Just hang a left at Maryland and go straight. Ya can’t miss it!

  148. Redd Capp says:

    Either it’s me, or there’s some bad candy corn going around.

  149. smudge says:

    Take that thing off or I’ll carve you a new one!

  150. Llanally says:

    Still more natural looking than self-tanner.

  151. April says:

    Have you been watching Martha Stewart makeovers again?

  152. April says:

    Have you done something different with your beak?

  153. orangelagoon says:

    I thought we were going as chickens this year.

  154. Beth says:

    You should wait for the Peanuts gang…. You’re The Great Pumpchicken, right?

  155. chick_o_rama says:

    Nice try, Ichabod!
    You’re going to have to learn to ride a horse to pull that one off!

  156. Michele says:

    “What do you mean, ‘Do I know Ichabod Crane?’

  157. Flarn Barnsen says:

    It must be “that time of the month.”

  158. Flarn Barnsen says:

    I’m no doctor, but my guess is that it’s inoperable.

  159. Flarn Barnsen says:

    That was Michael Jackson on the phone. He wants first dibs on your bones after you die. We don’t have to tell him it’s just a costume.

  160. Dart says:

    Next time we’ll carve in before you put it over your face… I’ll call 911, you try not to drip on the carpet.

  161. micedwhale says:

    Now that we have seen what it looks like on a pumpkin, lets carve out your real eyes and beak.

    “I’m just a girl, standing before a boy, asking him to love me.”


    Hey, Michael Moore called he wants his head back.

    Hey the 19th century called they want their horror back.

    I think you may need some Claritin.

  162. Jim Rockford says:

    Ah, dread spirit! What hellish coop unleashed thee on the night?

  163. Jim Rockford says:

    Take thy beak from out my heart, and take thy head from out that gourd.

  164. Jim Rockford says:

    Sir, you mock me! And I will not be mocked! Shall we say pistols at dawn?

  165. Jim Rockford says:

    Before the night is out, you will be at the center of one wicked egg tossing.

  166. Jim Rockford says:

    Yes, it does make you look fat.

  167. dr_washo says:

    “Angels and ministers of grace defend us…”

    Hamlet Act 1 Scene 4

  168. Morgan says:

    Dude… You stuck your head up that pumpkin’s ass… That’s hot.

  169. Jim Rockford says:

    Since it is unlikely we will ever meet again, let me say now that I have always regarded you as a wise and sensible chicken.

  170. Jim Rockford says:

    Of all the pumpkin patches on all the farms in all the world, you walk into mine…

  171. Coach says:

    Are you NUTS! Those humans like pumpkin pie just as much as FRIED CHICKEN!!

  172. micedwhale says:

    you are perfect evidence of why we should check our candy for tampering.

  173. micedwhale says:

    Catholic chickens agree that this is poor planning for All Saints Day.

  174. micedwhale says:

    My costume is scarier. I’m salmonella.

  175. hypnobee says:

    You always come whining to me, I have my head stuck in a pumpkin, my mother died, I have cancer…where does it end?

  176. colecole says:

    ahh, the headless chickenman.

  177. TheGreatTimeWaster says:

    The truth? Okay. That costume is stu….er… really scary. Those Trekkies got nothing on you.

  178. TheGreatTimeWaster says:

    I told you! Pretending to be an ostrich by sticking your head in the ground while you were in the vegetable garden will get you a great costume!

  179. Cheeseduck says:

    The witch costume was more flattering to your figure.

    I thought you were going as a nudist…

    I told you it would get stuck…

    Really? It smells? I never would have guessed…

    Is that my Jack-o-Lantern?

    Don’t tell, me: you’re a cheep bastard?

    Spent your costume allowance on candy again, didn’t you?

    No, your butt looks just fine in that.

    I not sure whether to light your face on fire or smash you in the road…

  180. Sweetzi says:

    Face it, you’re scarier without a costume !!

  181. Pedestrian Rage says:

    I see that whatever was in your ass has just decided to come out the other end.

  182. Darren says:

    “O’Lantern. That’s Irish, isn’t it, Jack?”

  183. Darren says:

    Nice, but I’m going as a chicken again this year.

  184. Darren says:

    Why the sad face, Pun’kin?

  185. srvvrs says:

    I am wearing my mask. I’m going as you!

  186. srvvrs says:

    Cucurbita pleno-head…how cliche.

  187. Jim Rockford says:

    A chicken mid-life crisis is not a pretty thing.

  188. srvvrs says:

    Corrected version after actually doing a little research (as little as possible too)

    “Cucurbita maxima-head…how cliche”

    does this officially mean I have no life now?

  189. Erla says:

    Unkle boris, where have you been all these years?

  190. ohnonichole says:

    when i asked you to dress up to add a bit of spice to our marriage, i didn’t mean that.

  191. TheGreatTimeWaster says:

    Alright fine! I’m sorry I called you “Pumpkin” at the last office Halloween Party. Can’t you just drop it?

  192. Lindsey says:

    well i dont like your face

  193. Lindsey says:

    you know the saying curiosity killed the cat and got the chickens head stuck in a pumpkin

  194. srvvrs says:

    I guess this explains the severed chicken head in the freezer.

  195. srvvrs says:

    You’re too late…Linus was institutionalized 14 years ago.

  196. srvvrs says:

    If you’re Christopher Walken, dreams really do come true!!

  197. srvvrs says:

    So when I give the signal, you come running in like a chicken with it’s…well you know.

  198. srvvrs says:

    Wow, you were right. This works so much better than that banana did.

  199. srvvrs says:

    No, no…seriously, I don’t even notice your pimples anymore.

  200. srvvrs says:

    They said combining Xanax, Viagra and Jack Daniels would cause hallucinations…but I honestly thought they were kidding!

  201. srvvrs says:

    Sleepy Hollow…Sleepy Hollow…hmmmm, I think you take I-10 to exit 4. You sure you want to go there at this time of night?

  202. srvvrs says:

    Well, girls don’t really like pumpkin-heads either…may I suggest a Hasselhoff mask?

  203. Steveomatic says:

    So can I assume in March you’ll have your head up a Leprechauns ass?

  204. Steveomatic says:

    “Now when I count to 3 you’ll awaken and forget any of this ever happened”

  205. Chuck V. says:

    I don’t care if it is Halloween! I don’t kiss on the 1st date!!

  206. jane says:

    You look gourdgeous!

  207. jane says:

    You look gourdgeous!

  208. veronicamccuin says:

    They say that eyes are the windows to the soul.

  209. Fourwall Jackson says:

    You read the end of the email.
    “forward this to 10ppl before 10minutes, or yur hed will turn be a pumpkin”
    You thought you could mock the Fates without retribution?

  210. Jim Rockford says:

    “Aerodynamically sound”? No, but why do you care? We can’t fly anyway.

  211. emily says:

    “save some pumpkin for me”

  212. Helene says:

    Dude… stop making those “OOOOO” sounds.
    That stopped being funny 5 hours ago!

  213. lisa says:


  214. bocephus says:

    Nice hat.

  215. micedwhale says:

    You still don’t hold a candle to Willy Nelson. I hear that he can shoot lasers out of his eyes.

  216. Steveomatic says:

    No apples? This year try bobbing for pumpkins instead!!!

  217. Darth Reno says:

    The scary part is that you look smarter like that…

  218. Fourwall Jackson says:

    I use Crest Whitening.

  219. synical says:

    For the LAST TIME, I am NOT your son… and you’ve got the wrong helmet on.

  220. Ryan says:

    “Oh, that’s real original…”

  221. Veronicagd says:

    Your mother was scared by a WHAT? when she was laying your egg?

  222. gimlet says:

    “You mean YOU’RE the Great Pumpkin???”

  223. srvvrs says:

    Well, should we HEAD to the party?

  224. srvvrs says:

    He’s not only the president of Pumpkin-Head for Chickens…he’s also a client!

  225. srvvrs says:

    Well, I checked our insurance…you’re screwed.

  226. srvvrs says:

    Does this mean I can hit on your date tonight?

  227. srvvrs says:

    Scared? No, actually the word Halloweenie comes to mind.

  228. srvvrs says:

    Ernest Borgnine called…guess what he wants back.

  229. srvvrs says:

    You did know that you didn’t HAVE to cut your head off, right?

  230. B to the Y-Ram says:

    A bird in the pumpkin is worth two in the bush.

  231. B to the Y-Ram says:

    Well, when you told me you were going as a Jackass, this wasn’t what I was expecting.

  232. B to the Y-Ram says:


  233. poweracdcbass says:

    You need to get laid BIG time.

  234. o_irreverente says:

    dare you get near me… haven’t you heard of bird flu?

  235. Anonymous says:

    ah, i love easter.

  236. Anonymous says:

    I finally passed that nickel that I swallowed.

  237. Allison says:

    I should’ve stopped after two beers at that Halloween party….or maybe you should have.

  238. Dante says:

    “Ok I get it, Its not Christmas”

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