It’s my annual Halloween Contest! Complete this cartoon and you could win the Grand Prize:
- a one-of-a-kind zombified edition of Savage Chickens: A Survival Kit for Life in the Coop. I’ve drawn 100 zombies in this signed copy!
- a Death Works From Home coffee mug
- a set of three Savage Chickens buttons
I’ll also be giving away prizes to two runner-ups, who will both win a signed copy of my book.
To enter the contest, tell me what the chicken is saying in the above cartoon. You can add your entry (or entries) to the comments here, or send it to me via my contact form. Update: Winners announced!!
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756 Responses to Halloween Contest 2011
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Buy my new book!
“I knew I shoulda taken that left turn at Albuquerque.”
Lol 😀 😀
uhhh good thing I didn’t pack my brains…did you?
“Sorry guys, this isn’t a KFC drive-thru.”
“Yes, I will supersize it.”
And on our left, you’ll see the cast of “The Walking Egg”
Oh my!
Those fried-egg sunglasses sure have caught on!
I can never find a parking space around here.
“This 99% crowd is getting kinda handsey”
If this was from a movie the Chicken would be saying
“Sorry I can’t hear you, let me wind down my window…”
And here you can see the Iphone4S!
ROFLOFLOFLOFL!!! Apple cult for teh w1n!
“Honey, I think your new Justin Bieber haircut is working”
The chicken say: “Hey! Stop acting like a zombie, I couldn’t sleep either”
Are you sure that it’s the LSD hallucination?
“I’m gonna ask this guy if he knows where the Antique Roadshow is…he just looks like the type”
“Wall St? Yes, it’s that-a way!”
Brains! to you too thank you 🙂
We must be getting close to Iggy Pop concert now
1. “Those zombies kinda remind me of myself from Mondays to Fridays…”
2. “For the last time, my name is BRIAN, not Brain!”
Is it ALL of your lovers, mr.Berlusconi?
NO! I don’t want to talk with you about Jesus. Get lost!
Damn! The annual TV-writer’s guild meeting hit the town.
NO! The windshield doesn’t need any cleaning!
Ok, ok, I take the “Life undead” subscription. Now clear the path!
lg
Rüdiger aka Huhnbeauftragter
Yes, I support “Occupy Earth” but please, I have to get to Starbucks before work!
i don’t want my windows washed, thank you
🙂
See, I told you every one wants my brain!
Quick Doug, draw me a machine gun!
“Something tells me, they’ve opened another Walmart”
NOW that’s funny!!!
i find this one ezpecially funny since they are having a grand re-opening at the one in my town.
Win!
Is THIS Dave’s party? Are they all wearing the same costume?! Ew,this is like the worst Halloween EVER!
Look honey! One of those “thriller flashmob” I told you about.
Good one!
Ok so… Let’s not get out of the car. That’s a no-brainer.
Eww, rotten bodies! Honey, I think we’re heading to a sticky end.
I told you those guns in the trunk would come in handy.
Why are they ALL crossing the road?
This is funny. Good one buddy!
” I have this crazy urge to crowd-surf”
” I told you ‘honking politely’ wouldn’t work”
” I just thought of a really cool variation of mail-box baseball”
“…ok then let’s flip a coin, heads you get out and push, tails I stay in and steer”
“How much for your love, babe?”
so many identical zombie costume for Halloween
Sorry! No brains left. I just finished watching an 8-hour Jersey Shores marathon.
“Isn’t it wonderful that so many people have come to ZombieCON?”
1. You just had to get a new iPhone on release day.
2. Yes, I’m sure this is where the True Blood marathon is showing!
“Release the Honey Badger!”
“Honey, have you seen my keys?”
“Is this what they meant by the chicken-pocalyspe?”
I feel just like tuna…
Hahaha, that one looks like you!!!
Great another zombie jam.
Told you we’d to leave home earlier.
I told you not to pick up that hitch hiker, now we’ll never get them to leave us alone!
See! I told you that the “Preparedness 101: Zombie Apocalypse” would come in handy some day!
Now that’s just mean! They are called vitally challenged – and you know calling them zombies just breads more animosity!
This one might require too much cultural context. Hence the link included.
“Zitchdog!!”
That reference was Legendary!
“What do they mean by B B B B B BRRRAAAAIIINNNSSS ?”
“Rule number one of Zombie safari: don’t exit the vehicle.”
Excuse me, I’m looking for someone from International Rescue, can’t quite remember his name. Could you help?
“Here’s where I come when I want to boost my self-esteem. Don’t you feel like a rockstar?”
1. No, I don’t want to buy any cookies
2. Excuse me, can you tell me the way to the cemetary?
No, no! We’re looking for the house of Dr. “Branson”, not “Brains”
“Sorry could you return Paris Hilton brain please?”
Chicken Edition of The Walking Dead, Left 4 Dead (L4D), etc. series.
I never could tell the difference between protestors and the zombie apocalypse.
“We’re in trouble! They are looking for brains… well, I’m in trouble!”
You can take my wife…
Fantastic, this new zombie safaripark! Open the windows, so we can have a closer look…
“I wish Occupy Vancouver was a bit more lively…”
Ciao!
Brains? Is that a new type of candy I haven’t heard about?
I told you this street was a dead end!
My favorite so far!!!
“Well, maybe «Zombie Village» wasn’t just a weird name, afterall”
Is this the way to the Scientology convention?
“And you wanted to buy a convertible”
“I think there’s something wrong with the windscreen wipers – could you get out and check dear?”
“Dam – I forgot to pay the congestion charge” (may only apply to London).
“Well – there goes my no claims bonus”
“Look honey, a Sky News helicopter – we’re going to be on TV!”
“This park did a great job hiring these actors. They look like a real zombies.”
“Oh crap.”
simple, yet effective!
That Halloween costume sale at Target was quite the success!
Ya’ll suredo have pretty eyes.
This must be the queue for American Idol
Hey sweet, this body-spray really works!
“My, what big eyes you have!”
“I don’t think we’re in Kansas anymore!”
Remind me not to park in front of Starbucks again.
Pardon me, do you have any Brain Poupon?
“Oh no, it’s the Tea Party Brain Trust!”
“I should have known it was a trap when I got the invitation to speak at the Brain Surgeon Annual Conference.”
“Is this guy backing out or what?!”
“Are you sure this is the right way to the brainstorming seminar?”
“These are not the brains you’re looking for.”
“We might still have a chance to get out of this. Just play stupid.”
“Just play stupid.”
“This might be a good time for this trip to Europe (or: “this cruise”) you always wanted to take.”
Why did we have to visit wall street again?
And I thought the end of the world would solve the problem of traffic jam.
No, Honey, YOU ask for directions!
This is supposed to be Raccoon City, Where are the Raccoons?
I hate these paparazzi.
Occupy Brains!
1.You’re right, they do look like a lively bunch.
2.Need a lift, guys?
3.Who wants to help me change a tire? A little brawn for my friends’s brain?
4.Actually, he’s the brains behind this trip.
Let’s do the Time Warp again!
“Put up your windows, it’s the bawking dead!”
You can’t get ANYWHERE in Florida when death takes a holiday!
“They were right! The natives ARE friendly.”
“Brains”? Is that part of the local dialect?
Well, at least it’s better than the peddlers.
And you said the “No Solicitors” bumper sticker was a stupid idea.
Yea! Looks like NOW we’re in the 1%.
I know you don’t like to ask directions, dear, but I’m pretty sure they know the way to the mall.
1. “Yes, we are roof surfing … just like Teen Wolf.”
2. “excuse me, you with the scar … you’re slightly off-key”
3. “Wow, this mirror tint really works!”
Boy, the locals here sure seem friendly!
Hey, I think I just spotted Dave!
That one looks just like Uncle Phil
Quick get in I can only take some many of you to the side at one time.
“We’re here!”
“is this the line for the jobs fair?”
@!@I0 @# yourself you crazy hens the sky is not falling I repeat the SKY IS NOT FALLING
Can you tell me How to get to Chik-Fil-A?
We havde this free coupon we got in the mail …..Can you tell how to get to the Chik FIL- A Health SPA and Plaza?? We heard iths the best place to go to have us chickens served.
Hey are yu guyts soppossed to FLY the COOP
NO!IM NOT Simon COWELL you dirty Birdies!
“Hmm facebook must be down again.”
Don’t they feed these Occupy Wall Street people?
Hey, buddy, GREAT costume! Is it left or right to free parking for the Halloween Zombie Jamboree?
Oh for pity’s sake, Chikina! If I ask this guy which way will you stop?
“For the last time, we are not lost. This is normal.”
“At least this shooting range is free.”
“And yet, this is still better than being at work.”
Martha, I told you zombie rush hour was hell.
Overturned zombie truck? Great. Now we’ll never make our flight.
Why yes, I am a rocket scientist. Why do you ask?
Remember, keep reciting Wham! lyrics, and they won’t know we’re here…
Excuse me … do you have any Grey Poupon?
“It isn’t Black Friday yet, is it?”
Or “It isn’t Friday the 13th, is it?”
“So I take a right at “brains” and then a left at “brains” and I should be there?
Come on guys! I need to get to work!
“Next time this happens, I’m throwing this GPS out the window.”
Ad@m
1.”Oh you’re here for the Thunderbirds expo as well?”
2. “Yes, we put him on the roof if he’s been bad.”
1) “Sorry, I have no more brains left.”
2) “My brain tastes like chicken”
3) “This is your lucky day! I am selling Avon.”
either “No, I don’t have any fries with that. Why do you ask?”
“See, I told you we needed a grenade launcher”
or my favorite, “We must be in Toronto”
Sorry for the double post, but I had more ideas:
“Ok. I’ve gotta stop playing COD Zombies.”
“No-one told me this football stadium would be full.”
“Sorry mate, I’ve already got a lawyer.”
“System error. Stack overflow occurred while trying to count the number of chicken. Please restart.”
“Go away, I don’t have an iPhone! It’s a Galaxy S II!”
Ad@m
bock bock bock bock bock bock bock bock bock bock bock bock bock bock bock bock bock bock bock bock bock bock bock bock bock bock bock bock bock bock zombie clown car joke bock bock bock bock bock bock bock bock bock bock bock bock bock bock bock bock bock bock bock bock bock bock bock bock bock bock
Bite me.
Yes, it’s a new car. Thank you for noticing.
I am terrible at short so if you are willing to use 3pt font here are my submissions.
1) Oh for Christ sake… looks like we got another Beiber on top of the car.
2) Excuse me sir, I am looking for the farmers market. I have this car load of fresh brains that will go bad if I don’t get a move on.
3) Brains!?? Where we are going we don’t need brains.
“Hi there! We’re not from around here and we’re a little lost…can you tell us where the nearest Arby’s is located?”
“And to your right, you can see the 99%, celebrating their assimilation of Steve Jobs, Dennis Ritchie and John McCarthy.”
“Oooooh, Zombies! And they look so REAL, too! Honey, take a picture with your phone!”
“…Winners to be announced on October 31”
No, I’ve never considered drive through brain surgery. Are you sure it’s necessary?
I don’t think we’re in Kansas anymore.
“Do you know the way to San Jose?”
“Get out and push.”
Ha! Joke’s on them, I’ve got mono.
Well, at least the bird flu is not a worry anymore.
“Ok, guys, I’ll stop with the zombie jokes. They are no-brainers, after all! Ha!”
“Hey, there’s my doppelgänger!”
“Wait! I think I’ve seen this movie!”
“this Zombie Safari Tour is the best vacation EVER!”
(:3
Don’t worry, the car has zombie insurance.
On the bright side, looks like we don’t have to worry about your mother visiting next weekend
“Don’t worry, we’re in a Prius”
That’s why I love this neighborhood. Everyone’s so friendly!
No, Rain, R A I N street!
That reminds me… Isn’t your family coming to visit next week?
Good one!
Is this Occupy Raccoon City ?
I guess now would be a bad time to ask for directions!
It sounds like they’re saying “graaaains.”
“move guys, we don’t wanna miss The Walking Pets”
“This place is always so dead on a Friday night.”
“Honey, could you pass me the grenades?”
I knew last night’s screening of “Night of the Lepus” was a big mistake!
This is worse than Critical Mass!
Get out of my way, bird brain!
We’re clucked.
“Hey, can you direct us to the Mensa Conference…?”
This Occupy Elm Street is causing a traffic Nightmare!
Look honey, American consumers!
No no, we’re not part of the 1% with souls. We’re lawyers!
Quick, give them your brains!
1. “This is the last time I ask for directions!”
2. “Why no, my brain is actually quite small and not tasty.”
3. “Zombie Chicken Apocalypse? No, we’re just cartoons on post it notes!”
4. “I know I should’ve gotten this window fixed. Now I can’t roll it up!?”
1. I’d love to join you, but I’m a nonconformist.
2. I knew I shouldn’t have worn that new Tag for Zombies body spray.
3. Is it just me, or are these flash mobs getting out of hand.
The McRib must be back.
“This ‘Walking Dead’ safari is incredible! Grab my gun!”
“This ‘Walking Dead’ safari is incredible! Hand me my gun!”
What do you mean, no shotgun? Why’d you yell ‘shotgun’ if you didn’t actually bring one?
Wow, who would have though the post-apocalyptic traffic would be so bad?
We are NOT the brains you are looking for…
Don’t worry, I saw on TV how to deal with this sort of problem. Like a good neighbor, State Farm is there!
I told you we should have got our halloween costumes earlier, but no… you’re always procrastinating
“Zombies are so in right now”
1. “Hey, there are a lot of zombies out there.”
2. “Joe! What are _you_ doing here!?”
It’s 106 miles to Chicago, we got a full tank of gas, half a pack of cigarettes, it’s dark… and we’re surrounded by zombie chickens. Hit it.
we need sunglasses
Hey guys, why are there zombie chickens crossing the road?
What’s with all the zombies?
This must be the Colonels old car!
Do you think they see us?
They have over staffed this carwash!
Do you think they give directions?
It’s hard to see the flock for the chickens!
Which way to highway 66?
“Look at all these people who kindly welcome us in their land !”
Excuse me, which way to Evan’s City?
You’ll be safe. They’re looking for brains.
Sing with me: 99 zombies attacking my car! 99 zombies attack! If one of those…
Yeah, these zombie herds bog down my commute about once a week.
Crap! I always seem to get caught at a “brains” crossing!
Excuse me, can you recommend a nice fast food restaurant?
Look kids, a zombie pride parade!
“This must be how the Beatles felt”
No, actually, this car is a Soul.
“No, I don’t have any grains!”
“What an overwhelming welcome. And the locals really seem to value intelligence. We’ll love living here!”
They’re here… they’re chickens… they’re dead… get used to it.
Look Honey! It’s a remake of the Thriller video!
“Hurry, drop the gun, give ’em the canolis!”
“Stupid paparazzi! They forgot their cameras!”
Why are all these zombie chickens crossing the road?
“No, no- I said MAIN street.”
“Hey darling, now we will see how’s really the brainy one of us!” (for all chicken-women)
or
“Stop staring at my brain! I’v got eyes too! I am a chicken with emotions!” (for all chicken-men)
greetings from Switzerland!
“Sorry, but I cannot give a lift to all”
“You know, I’m pretty famous in this street “
“Pardon me, would you have any Grey Poupon?”
Do you think we can roll down our windows and feed them?
“Man, the 3D at this drive-in is amazing! I don’t even NEED glasses!”
Do you know the way to San Jose?
When they occupy Wall St. they REALLY occupy Wall St.
I think they’re saying we’re the 1% in some protest called “Occupy Zombieville”. Times are tough with so few brains to go around.
Excuse me… can you give me directions to some brains
1) “Look! I think I found Waldo.”
2) “I could have sworn it was only 27 days later.”
3) “I told you it was a bad idea to stick that Bruins Are #1 bumper sticker on your car here in Vancouver.”
4) “Here come the Zombierazzi Ms. Spears. Better keep your legs and your skull closed.”
Why are so many chickens crossing the road?
“Pluck me, it’s the zombie flockalypse!”
“You can´t bite me, you don´t have any teeth!”
“Why do you insist in the brains? Why not the wings, or the legs? I heard that they are very good.”
“Am I in the right place to sign on as an extra in ‘The Clucking Dead’?
Brains? No, we gave at the office.
They love me! They really love me!
Sorry, I left my brain in my other pants.
Zombies? What zombies?!?
I don’t know dear, why are the chickens crossing the road?
Wait a minute…that guy owes me $20
OK, you are right – I should have stopped to get gas sooner – are you happy now?
Where is Chuck Norris when you need him?!
OK, so maybe dressing Timmy as Frank Perdue wasn’t such a good idea.
Is that the neurologist’s office ahead on the left? This lunch hour traffic is horrendous.
“Look honey, the people are so friendly here!”
Opt. No.1 “.. so, yes: Driving the Popemobile really does bite.”
Opt. No.2 “Soylent Green is CHICKEN!”
Opt. No.3 “Say, wasn’t that your sister on the grille?”
F***king Map Quest!!!
funny 🙂
Plucking MapQuest
…look honey, a Thriller Flash Mob?!!!
Hey becarful or i,ll call the ghost of CORNAL SUANDERS
A fowl wind blows…
…I didn’t expect Anonymous
They are chickens
They are legion
They do not forgive
They do not for…
..wait, what was I saying?
…hey, aren’t you on my Facebook?!!!
“So this is Florida…”
“Look, honey! The Tea Party Convention.”
“We should’ve sprung for the darker tint.”
“Oh, c’mon! I just had this detailed!”
It was inevitable.
Our Zombie Chickens have come home to roost.
“Oh, look honey! The McRib is back!”
Look honey, its Doug……….honey?!
On our left we have the Zombie Chicken Hordes.
I wonder what brains taste like…
…probably like… OH CRAP!
Directions? Sure…. the “Thriller” video shoot is two blocks down on the left!
Which way to the Zombie-flash-mob?
All I asked was “Where was the nearest Kentucky Fried Zombie place”
Excuse me, can you direct us to the Bates Motel?
Did just a new Apple product come out?
You don’t want to eat me! I’m not a free range chicken, I was raised in a cage.
OK, car made of brains, bad idea.
It looks like the townfolke changed their mind and don’t want us to leave.
See honey,now you know why they call me chick magnet!!!
Leave me alone I’m not that Bieber kid…
Eat Mor Chikin
“I told Colonel Sanders this would happen . . . .”
When city chickens meet country chickens….
“Children of the corn, children of the corn!”
“No honey, the brochure specifically said ‘don’t feed the zombies’. So you get out of the car!”
And here we have the result of the Sarah Palin-Rhode Island Red hybridization experiment.
“It’s like they’re trying to give me directions… I know it”
Now I’m thinking that the poster “17th annual congress of cannibals” was not a joke.
Yes, my daughter’s 18 now, but you’ll not have her stupid punks.
I’m the inventer of the first self-propelled vehicle. Hail to the Benz!
At the left side you can see the main actors of “Walking Dead” series.
“Look mom, KFC recruiters”
“Ok, try not to move and pretend you’re beef”
1: I hear George Romero’s in town! Any of you guys know where he’s at?
2: Is it just me, or does that one look like Vincent Price?
3: OMG! They finally have working 3D without those stupid glasses.
“Look honey. They’re remaking Stephen King’s ‘The Stand!'”
“I know where we came from – but where did all you zombies come from?”
I meant to cite this, but I guess I didn’t use the right markup. It’s a mis-quote from Robt. Heinlein’s story “All You Zombies”, available here and other places.
Hey, does it look like I have brains? I am driving a Hummer afterall.
Hey, look, I think that’s Joe!
“Yes, yes. I get WHY we crossed the road but are any of us going to cross BACK!?”
These teen fads have really got out of hand.
See this is why you get your flu shot.
Isn’t it great that zombies can’t drive.
Whoa déjà vu
“Zombies! Why does it always have to be Zombies!”
“So you are the 99%… braindead?”
Look, Ma! It’s ol’ crazy eyes, Michele Bachmann!
It could be worse… there could be poultrygeists!
How is this MY fault?!?!
Well it could be worse. At least there’s parking.
I am loving all this attention.
“I knew we should have pre-ordered the new iPhone.”
We should have made left turn at Albuquerque!
“I guess we´ve maded it! Raccoon City should be right ahead.”
“Who ordered the Original Recipe bucket with the large cole slaw.”
Okay, who has their brain?
I told you we should have packed a spare brain.
Woohoo! I’m famous!!!
Excuse me, can you tell me how to get to the
Brain Injury Research Institute?
“You know what, I think we *are* in Kansas”
MOO!
“Hey, what’s on your mind?”
“So the rush hour tedium finally got to you guys, too?”
Honey, look! This young twisted fellow chap here that utters gibberish might want to eat our brains. This, or it’s just an invitation to dance with Michael Jackson!
Rule 31 then Rule 22.
Are you saying this is not the Vegan Rights protest?
You guys seem like a lively bunch. Are you brainiacs going to the ZombieCon too?
I love my fans – they love me for my body AND my brains.
“Don’t take the freeway you said.
The surface streets will be faster you said.”
Yes, I do get enough Omega 3 – why do you ask?
Oh no, we’ve stumbled upon Occupy the Chicken Ranch.
I hope, I don’t repeat anything that has already been written, I was too lazy to read through more than 230 comments…
“You win, I can’t find Waldo.”
Oh my gosh! Is that Pamela Anderson?
1. Zombie costumes are really popular this year.
2. We should have bought more candy corn!
What? I can’t hear you, let me unroll the window..
“I think we should make a bolt for it…”
“I think we went down one of those un-dead-end streets.”
No brains here!
“Which came first, the zombie chicken or the egg?”
I’m telling you, “Occupy Coroner’s Office” is NOT an actual thing.
These aren’t the brains you’re looking for.
So, I guess buying our GPS from that voodoo priest was a bad idea.
“Strange, I thought zombie apocalypse was next month.”
“You see honey, this is what eating out all the time will do to you.”
“Didn’t I tell you, cheaper and a lot more fun than paris.”
“Who ya gonna call?”
“Told you my Left 4 Dead training would come in handy someday.”
“Dang! still no reception.”
Driver: Wow, a herd of ZombieHoneyBadgers.
Passenger: HoneyBadgers?! They look like Chickens…
Driver: ZombieHoneyBadgers Don’t Care!
I told you we should of dressed up as Snooki and J-WOWW!!
“Quick Bob, dilate your pupils!”
“Valet parking! I wonder if it’s complimentary.”
ZOMBIES: eat flesh.
OK.
You can shoot them, pluck them, smash them, impale them, machete them…
…but whatever you do, don’t choke them.
We’ll lose our PG-13 rating.
You have to form a cue if you want food!
“I told you this was a bad way to get to the mall. But noooo, you wanted to take the scenic route.”
Oh, how lovely! Qin Shi Huang’s Terracotta Army!
what does that even mean, “braaains”??
Revising my last one: “Which came first, the chicken or the zombie?”
“I told them ‘genetically modified’ wasn’t a flavor of corn!”
Can’t touch this!
Strange… I didn’t think there would be so many Red Sox fans out this time of year!
I knew it! Cindy from the office always wanted a piece of me…
“Man, carpooling has become such a pain.”
Stinky guys biting at the first move, we must be in San Diego’s Comicon!
I’m guessing that asking for any Grey Poupon would be out of the question…
Detroit, here we are!
Driver- They are so cute in their natural habitat.
Passenger- I told you we shouldn’t drive through the Wall street area at this time of night. They get restless when there are no bankers around to chew on.
“Is it really true that 99% of the brains are consumed by 1% of the population?”
Oh god, it’s like Hitchcock and Romero had a thousand children and they all want to eat us.
where would you like the brain buffet setup?
Oh, hey! It’s those “Squawkkupy Wall St” folks!
“Black Friday just keeps getting earlier every year.”
“There’s nothing to worry about! We’re reality tv producers!”
Okay! Okay! Next time, we’ll travel by “TRAINS!” Now get out of our way!
Hey buddy, is this a dead end?
With the lock-out still going on, NBA players have found something else to keep themselves busy.
On the bright side at least I’ll finally get “The Monster Mash” out of my head!
I guess the beach will be a bit crowded this holiday.
I’m not suposed to be scared of anything
but I don’t know where I am
I wish that I could move but I’m surrounded
with no one to lend a hand
I’m trying hard to think now
but there’s no idea in my head
There’s only you to talk to
and the brain inside makes me feel dumb
I’d better get out, so now
They’ll help me, ‘Cause I don’t know
I’ll be going through changes, changes
God, I wish I was brainless lately
Stay in the car, I’ll save us
Flat tire needs changes, changes
Could you tell me how to get to the hospital?
You zombies are out of luck this is WASHINGTON D.C. they have no brains here
Is there a John Wells here?
Is there a nice place to get something to eat around here?
“Oh crap… I think we’re too late for the zombie-contest…!”
with love from the Netherlands, Janneke
How come only you and the other guy by the corner have tongues?
Excuse ME! I’m trying to get to Burger King here!
Ok, I get it. You are the 99%.
“The zebras and giraffes are next!”
About time someone recognized my genius!
These “more brains” activists really can organize.
“Grains? This one must be a vegan.”
“Guys move out of my way!! I am on my way to a Usher concert!!!
1) Take my wife here. She is the brainy type.
2) Are you all Timmy’s friends?
3) Bite me!
4) Finally I have a good excuse for being late for work.
“Pardon me. Is this how we get to the other side?”
It’s quite all right dear, I’ll just ask these fine folk for directions.
Zombies – Shmombies! You see one, you’ve seen them all!
I swear your family reunions get weirder every year.
Oh look dear, your family has arrived for the holidays.
Note to self. Tell doctor never give discounts on botox again.
Yea, I would have kept driving too but my wife INSISTED I stop and ask for directions
Oh, I’m not worried about the zombies. I don’t have any brains left, anyway.
“Free safari to Zombia, you said! Probably a typo, you said!”
Great. Drove right into a ‘Walking Dead’ episode again.
I hate Illinois zombies!
We’re not stopping until I find a Twinkie!!
Oh look it’s Bob from accounting! He hasn’t changed much.
Damn that Camping Fellow.
So, I turn left at ‘BRAINS’, drive 2 blocks and turn right at ‘MORE BRAINS’? That’s not what my GPS said…
Dude, that guy owes me money!
Wow, a real zombie flash mob! Quick, put on Thriller and let’s join them! Wait…
They are Romero zombies so this should be an easy escape.
Finally a chance to use that Groupon! With these kind of savings, we’re going to make a killing…
1. I must runneth them over, for “the quality of mercy is plenty strained” let the tires on this vehicle “droppeth as a chainsaw from hell.”
-Double Feature
2. What ever happened to that anti-zombie writing campaign!?!
-Time For Action
hurry robin, grab the zombie reppelent bat spray
i knew i should have bought some holy water at that last exit
“well,at least I have insurance.”
“is this the new petting zoo?
The only thing nearby is the Jersey Shore house set, starving and pissed off
i knew we’d get caught in the rush from the marylin manson concert.
Sorry, I left my brains in my other coop.
“Oh no!!! Our family reunion wasn’t supposed to be ’till next month!!!!”
😀
“Maybe their veggitarians.”
“We’re with Fox News. I can assure you there are no brains in this car.”
“These aren’t the brains you’re looking for”
I am Norman. Let me coordinate you.
You’ve seen one zombie, you’ve seen them all.
“I gave at the office!”
or
“I love these safaris. You get so close to the animals!”
or
“Whoa, Steve, I think that Axe spray really works!”
I hate these Black Friday crowds!
I guess we’re not the only ones waiting in line for the iPad 4
or
Looks like everyone’s here for the Royal Wedding!
“I’m sorry, I don’t have any ‘brains poupon’.”
“I don’t think this is Occupy Wall Street after all.”
1. Honey, do chicken brains taste like chicken too?
2. Hey brainless, knock on the doors of HOUSES for candy – not cars!
3. Remember those good old days when every kid had a different costume?
Chicken says: “I see UNDEAD people.”
PS: Beat this, suckers!
MAN, ITS LIKE A JUSTIN BEIBER CONCERT CAME TO TOWN.
WOW, THIS MOVIE IS IN 3D
Hey zombie chicken you’re a really good actor. That makeup looks so real. You should audition for the Walking Dead
chicken: Hey, can you find me a parking lot.
zombie: rawrrrr!!
chicken: ok so a right?
chicken: hey, zombie can you find me a parking space
zombie: rawr!!!!!
chicken: so a right?
or
Are you guys auditioning for a walking dead episode?
“Ugh. I HATE driving with you, J-Lo”
Dammit, the Canucks must have lost again.
Don’t eat us! Our brains taste like chicken!
See, honey, I told you we should’ve gotten that Lexus. It had space for food, water, ammunition, AND it had parking assist!
Yes, I told you I’m lost. But you don’t have to be sarcastic about it.
Oh boy, I hope no-one steps on the eggs!!!!!!
I hate CHOGM
This is why I didn’t want to ask the locals for directions….
Wheres my boom stick honey?
1) “What the Cluck?!?!?”
2) “Edna, He says he wants directions to Saskatoon.”
3) Seen one hipster chick, seen ’em ALL…
It’s confirmed, Steve’s safely reached the Other Side and launched iAfterLife.
“The Kiss Army is really starting to show it’s age”
I’ve a feeling we are not in Kansas anymore
This surely looks like the Boulevard of Broken Dreams. Excuse me, kind sir, do you know the way to Hotel California?
Don’t mind us. Our brains are only the size of walnuts.
There is something on your mind by the way you look at me
I have the strange feeling they want something from us
I think I’ve finally seen Jacko! There on the eleventh row!
“Get your chicken fingers off my car!”
“Looks like a new chicken fast food joint is in town.”
“Ok just breathe..They want brains we’ll give them your fruit cake…it looks the same.”
“Say! Do any of you guys know the Madison?” (Caption: Rocky Horror Picture Show with Zombies)
Great Costumes!
You were right, I was wrong; This is a pedestrian thoroughfare. Are you happy, now?
You can’t eat our brains! We zoom by!
“Vote for me !”
Next Halloween we visit MY cousins!
O this is funny! 🙂
Dude, I see rainbow colored zombie chickens! We should smoke this more often.
I changed my mind, I want the Dracula costume.
Honey, I know they want to eat our brains, but I still can’t force my self to just run them over! Maybe we can talk this out?
“I think I found Waldo”
“I start to believe I should have chosen Trick”
“Your mother will fit right in”
“I thought I just left work”
“Give em the kid!”
I just love to see these protesters gathering for a cause.
Wait, is this like “Occupy Wall Street?”
Look, honey! It’s the world’s only chicken with a tongue!
People are finally appreciating me for my brains.
“So this is the line for Obamacare?”
U.S. political joke XD
No no BrainTREE, I need to get to BrainTREE, Massachu-ugh, never mind.
yeah yeah yeah Ron Paul 2012, I got it, Thanks. Sheesh.
Next time we won’t take the “detour” sign written in brains.
Take me, but let my wife go: she doesn’t have what you’re looking for.
Ok, tell me again: how flammable are feathers?
Shiver me timbers! Wait, wrong movie.
I thought they would sparkle on the sun! Wait, nevermind, that’s vampires.
hey, look! Wall Street guys!
“Looks like another hockey riot! Vancouver should really change their starting lineup.”
psychiatrist help? anyone?
hey, look! Justin Bieber’s fans!
Now, now, ladies. I’m engaged, sorry!
So this is overpopulation?
That’s it! My next book. After Baby Boomers, ‘Zombie Boomers’!
“Who knew Marty Feldman had so many fans?”
“I told you we should have bought a car with windows”
“The Penguins must be playing tonight”
“No, my name is BRIAN”
“Noooo! I just broke a nail”
“Don’t worry dear; I’m never gonna give you up, never gonna let you down…”
?”What do you MEAN there’s a Chik Fil’ A opening in town?”
“No, not Brains. Maine. We are trying to find the highway to Maine.”
“Maybe we are in Quebec.”
Is this the exit for Raccoon City?
“I know, I know! But the sign clearly says that pedestrians have the right of way.”
These comic cons get bigger every year.
UNGH. UNNGH!
“Wow, I’ve got so many fans!”
I knew I should have taken that left turn at Albuquerque!
Man these Occupy protests are getting out of hand. They’ve been occupying the graveyard for centuries and now they have a problem?
“Must be a big sale at Aberzombie & Fitch.”
“Dude, this tour of Doug Savage’s mind is awesome. Can’t wait for the Ninja display!”
“Quick, play some Miley Cyrus songs. It’s the only thing that repels even Zombies.”
We’re here to facilitate the unemployed zombie conference.
Who is the brains behind this operation?
I love these annual Fall zombie drives through New England.
No, not brains! I’m looking for the 401.
Now do you see why I didn’t want to stop for directions?!?
This must be one of those flash mob things.
Hey! Who are you calling a chicken!
So this is Georgia?
Do you think they valet?
c’mon….it’s my first date!
don’t worry honey i know………. tai chi!!!
…these aren´t the brains your looking for (Jedi mind trick)
Have you ever had that… not so fresh feeling?
Ahhhhh, Sunny California at last!
“So this is what it feels like to be wanted!”
Brilliant
(1) Don’t Occupy my car!
(2) A drive-in zombie movie was a REALLY BAD IDEA!
(3) Oh man, I thought finding the escaped killer would be easier than this.
Did we miss the MENSA meeting?
So THAT’s what part the “Nugget” is!
“They’ve torn off the streetview cam. We’ll get fired for sure.”
“No! I will not ask for directions!”
White matter or Dark matter?
I think we stranded in an ‘occupy’ riot!
Relax, honey, they’re after brains – you’re safe!
Wish we’d sprung for tinted windows.
Load my shotgun, Bonnie, birdshot ought to do it.
Brains? Not for thy zombie kingdom. Zombies, away!
We shall chide downright, if I longer stay.
(Shakespeare reference – A Midsummer Night’s Dream)
Just follow my lead and we might make it through. “Braaaaaaains…”
You like it? It was a bargain, and makes a great mileage!
“Hey guys, the McDonalds is over there!!!”
“Frank, I think all the Zebra in this safari came down with the ‘Bird Flu’…better not roll down the windows.”
Don’t worry, the zombies are after brains, you’re safe.
Woah dude, they’re chick-en us out!
“Great Scott, Marty!! All of your children are ZOMBIES!”
“We are totally fried!”
Night of the Living Dead, Dawn of the Dead… Is this Fowl of the Dead?
‘Excuse Me, Do any of you know where we could grab a bite?
Wow, Detroit is livelier than I thought.
Previously, in The Clucking Dead…
“okay, now’s my turn. CHICKENBURGEEER!”
“..and this on our left is a famous painting called BRAINS”
Our attempt to bring back the chicken dance has failed, this electric-slide thing is way too powerful!
I thought we told the GPS to avoid zombie crossings!
Look Honey! Its just like one of those Halloween movies!
Is it time for the zombie migrations already?
My, what a big mouth you have!
Nuggets! I thought the costume contest was on Monday!
Look! Its a Thriller Flash-Dance Mob!
J-walkers? At this time of night?
See honey, I TOLD you the mechanic would be right here to fix the car.
Have no fear… The brains are here!
Surrounded by zombies? There’s an app for that!
heh 🙂
the breeding program has been a great success
“Man, I could swear I had brought the keys”
or
“Ok, now we just need to push start the car”
Occupy Monroeville Mall just keeps growing and growing…
Aren’t we fixing a blown MAINS?
“You should see them do this when I’m on the toilet”
“Got that? Okay, last step: remove the brain from the skull cavity. It’s not rocket science.”
Let’s Deep Fry these suckers!
Where’s Colonel Sanders when you need him?
Well, we’re in Zombieland, where’s my twinkie?
Too many chickens crossing the road! I wonder why?
“They’re a bit bitey.”
“This Occupy movement hurts my head.”
Should NOT have bought that last iPhone 4S…
Do you know where you are?
Can you tell me?
i think you missed your turn the dead end is that way
we should just eat them bones and all. no dude were not McDonalds
“If I only had a Brain? Yes, that is a great song, but doesn’t seem very Christmas like. Change the radio station!”
3 hours for AAA? Zombies in 3 minutes!
“No, I don’t carpool…use the bus”
“You didn’t get me right, i was asking for the campus, not hippocampus!”
It’s suppertime!!
Excuse me, is this the way to #Occupy Elm Street?
Seriously… These hipsters are beginning to all look the same…
Lois, I think it’s time for me to tell you the truth. I’m not just Cluck Kent, mild mannered reporter…
“We’re surrounded by horrible mindless zombies…Oh wait, it’s just another occupy Wall St. protest”
(I also emailed this to the site, but I’m not sure it went through!)
Hey look guys! I’sn’t that Albert Einstein over there, with Isaac Newton and Stephen Hawking?
Yes, it was a bad idea to take a shortcut through Zombie town. It’s a ‘no-brainer’.
I told you we should have stopped for gas at the last station, but nooooooo, you were afraid you’d miss ‘The Walking Dead’.
Dorothy, maybe the wizard can help them too. Follow the yellow brick road guys!
“Every day they’re shuffling!”
Reference to this video
Last year everyone was a vampire. This year it’s zombies. I hate Halloween!
Trains? Cranes? Claude Rains? Speak up man, I can’t understand you.
These guys are holding up traffic. I’m going to give them a piece of my mind!
“Either we stumbled onto the Resident Evil film set, or we’re in deep chicken shit.”
It’s only a dream! It’s only a dream! This never happens when I’m watching ‘Breaking Bad’.
No matter where you go, you can’t get away from these Kardashians.
No, no, no…the windshield is clean!
I was trying to get away from these guys. THAT is why I crossed the road.
It’s always brains with you guys. That’s why you’re so unhealthy. Balance your diet! Graiiiiins!
They said “angry mob”. I mean, they don’t seem angry. They’re just hungry!
Looks like someone got into the Worchestire sauce again…
If I had any brains, would I be here?
I hate shopping at 4am on the day after Thanksgiving– you can never get a parking spot.
1) What was the rule about zombie pedestrians on the road?
2) This was not in the manual, sir..
3) Has being environmentally friendly come this far?
This is why I like Christmas the most.
This would have been scary if they didn’t look like us.
I read in Costumes Today that the Savage Chicken would be the #1 costume in 2011. I guess they were right!
Last sentence of Chick Nicholson at the steering wheel: „OK friends, you ever danced with the devil in the pale moonlight ?“
Oh look, the 99%!
– My god, why this monday traffic is always the same?
– I thought that “Zombies Ahead” sign was just a joke.
– You shouldn’t have showed them your spare change honey, you know they can smell it.
So your name is Brains, and his name is Brains. Nice to meet you guys!
I knew everybody would love the meat car.
– Back off, I know powerpoint and I’m not afraid to use it!
Ok, ok, I’ll ask them for directions.
“Did you say we take a left at the DRAIN?”
“No, I don’t know where the ‘Breaking Dawn’ premier is.”
“Is this the parking for the neurosurgery convention?”
‘I don’t care what the GPS says! This is NOT our final destination!!
Directions to the cemetary? Just head to the dead centre of town! HAHAHA…get it?…heheh…ahem…I don’t think they got it.
“See honey, this is what happens to people when the internet is down for too long”
I told you! The amount of attention you get from a personalised number plate makes it worth every penny.
or
I wasn’t kidding when I said alot of people say I look like Justin Bieber.
“That’s not how I remember Disneyland.”
Guys, if you just let me squeeze by, I’ll be back with the brains in a jiffy.
I think they are saying “the rain in Spain falls mainly in the plain.”
Yes, we are heading to “the plane, the plane.”
There must be a new iphone coming out at the apple store round the corner or something…
Honey….I think we have a problem…
Relax, they are looking for brains. We will just pretend we are those guys from Jersey Shore and they will walk right past us…
Brains!? Is that all you guys think about?!
“sorry mate, no brains in this car. Do you need a ride?”
– Take car. Go to mum’s. Kill Phil, grab Liz, go to the Winchester, have a nice cold pint, and wait for all of this to blow over.
– No, I don’t wanna take you for a ride either!
– No sorry, I haven’t seen a so called Mr BRAINS.
– ‘by removing the head or destoying the brain’… we are so screwed!
“What do you mean by ‘Wall Street'”?!?
“Pheeeew, I’m happy this isn’t a cheap B-class horror movie”
“OK, why not, I’ll have two brains with my super-sized happy chicken menu, and a salad on the size”
“Cervaux? Damn, I knew we shouldn’t pass by Montreal”
“Cerebros? Great news, we are almost in Tijuana”
“No thanks, your zombie flashmob is kinda lame and I don’t want to join”
“No, I’m not Justin Bieber, but I once sniffed a pack with Charlie Sheen”
Look honey! Clones!
Now this is something Malthus never thought of.
“He says it’s the First Annual George A. Romero Walk for Brains, and would we like to make a donation?”
wow! the KFC drive thru really comes alive at Halloween.
“No really, the free range chickens are in the car behind”
“Hey, it looks like I’m the 1%!”
“Excuse me, is this Occupy Hades?”
wll… fuck
raccoon city is preaty mess up
so this happens when you turn in a dead end.
so… “iPhone brain” it is.
this wouldn’t happened if we where in Disney, but noooo you wanted wall street.
mondays stinks.
I am glad I take the day off.
so this is how people looks like when they try to make a savage chicken joke.
yeah yeah, free savage chicken stuff an all zombie out.
“I think I left the oven on at home.”
What was the rule about tailgating pedestrians?
Honey, I think I just laid an egg…
“car crowd surfing doesn’t seem to work as well as I’d thought…”
“this is the last time I’m letting you drag me to one of your family reunions”
See hon, Twitter was right. I do have a thousand followers!
Hey Jerry, didn’t Dr.Simpson say something about us needing more practice patients at the dental clinic?
No wonder they seem so cranky, would you look at the size of those tonsils!
Brains?? Well that’s a relief! I was afraid you were after our livers.
Thank you all for coming. In a moment we we will begin our attempt for a Guiness Book world record:
Most Zombies in a Volkswagon!
1 “this is the moment I wake up”
2 ” #zombies on the road”
3 “nice joke for my birthday, honey”
4 “worst time travel ever”
5 “¡¡SPRING BREAK!!”
6 “out of gas… CRAP”
7 “one last kiss, my love”
8 “wish I hadn’t spent my last wish with this car”
hope they are totally new
Wow, this Halloween parade shows us chickens lack imagination when it comes to costumes!
Yes, yes, I’ll sign your ‘Equal Rights For Zombies’ petition.
No, I don’t want any brains! Oh man, those salesmen are annoying….
They’re not Zombies. They’re protesting ‘Fringe’ being pre-empted by the World Series.
I’ll tell you what, honey. You get out and change that flat tire. I’ll do the dishes for a month. Deal?
I know this is only a dream. I’ll wake up in a moment. No more staying up late playing ‘Plants vs. Zombies’.
This will be a good test of our new product: ‘Zombie-Off’.
You got to love Pennsylvania’s countryside, Barbra!
Which one of you ordered the pizzas with ‘extra brains’ topping?
I know I told you to pull my finger, but now I want it back.
You say you’re zombies? You’re really killing me, man. Wait a minute! You’re REALLY killing me man!
Why don’t you souless paparazzi get a life?
Please stop shoving and get in an orderly line. Rob Zombie will be happy to sign autogrpahs for all of you.
I’ve told you time and time again to always fill the tank on the flame thrower before we go out, but do you ever listen? Noooooooo!
That’s what I love about Autumn. The falling leaves, the crisp air, the Zombie Apocalypse…
I told you and told you: Garlic only works for vampires!
It took a lot of guts to come down here…and heart…and wings…and feet…and brains…
C’mon guys, have a heart! What do you mean, “yes!”?
It must be the ‘Tin Woodman’ fan club. They’re all asking for ‘brains’.
Error! Sorry, no brains here! 😉
It must be the ‘Scarecrow’ fan club. They’re all aksing for ‘brains’.
I need spellcheck. I’ll try this one more time. 😉
It must be the ‘Scarecrow’ fan club. They’re all asking for ‘brains’.
Am I trying too hard? 😉
This one’s got a bottle of ketchup. NOW, you can worry.
When the Zombie bars close, the traffic is murder.
Dana, easily my favorite so far. Very funny!! Good luck!!
I can’t get that old ‘Cranberries’ song out of my head. “In your head…In your head…Zombie…Zombie”.
Brains? Thanks for the compliment, but really, I’m not that smart.
There’s no one in this car except tv network executives. Better luck on the next car.
Moo?
Here’s 3 that I liked:
Beth – “I think we should make a bolt for it…”
ZEO – yeah yeah yeah Ron Paul 2012, I got it, Thanks. Sheesh.
Graham Freeman – “You know what, I think we *are* in Kansas”
(He’s right. I live in Kansas. 😉 )
On this episode of ‘Jack Hanna’s Into the Wild’, we’ll be visting the typical Zombie habitat. Notice how friendly they are. We’ll try to get as close as we can to observe them.
Title: Jack Hanna’s last show.
Lunchtime was only a hour ago. They don’t look hungry to me.
Famous last words.
I don’t care how good your costumes are kids; I’m not giving you any candy until Halloween.
It’s like I told you; this store has sales that would wake the dead.
Hey I loved you guys back in the day! ‘Time of the Season’, right on!
My name is Chuck Norris. I don’t think you want to mess with me.
I’m Detective John McCluck and this is my new movie: Die Hard Boiled! Yippee-ki-yay feather-plucker!
No I don’t have any spare change. Are you sure you’re a zombie?
“I love this resort … but it’s getting crowded!”
These must be Marty’s last year models!
“No, I’m afraid I don’t anyone by the name Burr Haynes.”
Look, guys, I’m sorry. I’ll never litter again, okay?
Brains? Sorry, we’re also looking for the Wizard of Oz.
Well, they all seem to want brains, so I guess we’re on the right track to find the Wizard of Oz.
now, it seems, angry birds get really addictive.
“Still think we should have walked…?”
“Say what you want, I’m glad we brought the car to the stadium”
“AAARGH!!! PEDESTRIANS!!!!”
“I’ll just get out real quick and ask what they want…”
“This reminds me of that one time, in band camp…:
WOW, you’re really popular, Mr. Brains!
So let me get this right; None of you deadbeats can help fix a flat tire?!?
Eh? Rain? I don’t think so but thanks for the warning!
I think I see Waldo!
Zombies to the left of me, Zombies to right, Here I am, back in the middle again!!
Is this the new iMOB 9000?
We must be getting close to Wall Street – they’re chanting “Bonds…bonds…”
“Told you, tinted window is a no-brainer.”
Well,
You know Aunt Emma……
She never missed a Family Zombie get together yet
“Need to cross the road?”
* “Now I’ll never get that Harry Belefonte song out of my head!” or “Anyone care to calypso?” http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=83j3FreaPlM
* “Maybe the CDC was on to something, after all…” http://www.bt.cdc.gov/socialmedia/zombies_blog.asp
* “Quick! Call Roadside Assistance.”
* “You remind me of the babe…” “What babe” “The babe with the power.” “What power?” “The power of voodoo.” “Who do?” “You do.”
* “Baron Semedi has really gone overboard this time.” http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0070328/
Check out my new 3D garage tapestry!
Dude, we’re Flocked
“I hate downtown after the football game…”
“Boy, I’m really glad we bought this hybrid instead of that gas guzzling SUV.”
Where is Chuck Norris when we need him?
Cheer up, it could be worse. Imagine a horde of Nyan-Cats!
Gee Kids this Drive Thru Zombie Zoo is the Greatest!
Man, that’s a small island. They all appear to be relatives of my uncle Frank.
“It must be the Zombie State Fair! Look over there– they have Deep Fried Brains on-a-stick!!!”
Listen. They’re welcoming us to the neighborhood. How nice.
Mr. Brain’s tragic misunderstanding.
I guess this year I’m not going to impress anyone with my zombie costume
Yes they are Zombies. that’s true. But…they’re Jewish Zombies, and we’re not kosher.
No, they’re not Zombies. They’re DirecTv customers and they’re mad about losing FX and the sports channels.*
(*next week)
Who orders a brain-topped pizza anyway?
My god! It’s a hundred people selling Amway! We’ve got to get out of here!
Listen to me, I’m a doctor. You need to balance your diet. Cut back on the raw meat. You need vegetables…Graaaiiiins!
ahh i like this one!
How did we end up at the Republican debate?*
(*or Democrat)
‘Tea Party’ or ‘Occupy Wall Street’?
I know I don’t look like you, but I’m a Zombie, I swear! I’ve been sick. I’m going out to get brains for everyone. Do you want fries?
Bahrain? That’s in the middle east isn’t it?
I’m sorry man; you are lost.
I think you’re gonna have to hold it in until we find another toilet stop, Gavin.
No offense…but you’re scratching the paint!
The mall is always packed this time of year.
Great I just walked into Thriller. Hey how do i get out of here.
Hey kids, its not Halloween yet. Why do you all have the same costumes, and why are you in the middle of the street?
Awesome Halloween party dude!!!!
zombie: Brains!!!!
chicken: No, I don’t have games. But I have monopoly at my house. Do you know where Jason chicken’s Halloween party is?
zombie: BRAINS!!!!!
chicken: No, I don’t think its going to rain! I have an umbrella if it does.
Awesome costumes dude!!! Where did you get it, Party City?
Over run by the swarming “gallus gallus zombies domesticus”, the frightend fowl sounds the international distress signal for help: “cluck-cluck-cluck / bawk-bawk-bawk / cluck-cluck-cluck!!!
I guess real chickens DO come from California Foster Farms.
“We can’t stop here. This is chicken country.”
“Don’t you mean, ‘Grrraaaiiinnnnnssss’?”
Trains? Silly thing to ask for!
….And a cheesburger with double fries.
“Oh yeah, the MENSA headquarters is just up the street. Why do you ask?”
“No, my name is BrIAn. And there’s just one. He’s Steve.”
Go-Go-Gadget chainsaw!
“Glove compartment. License and registration. Right next to the gun.”
The bankers are getting more desperate for their bonuses these days
“Quick! What does it say in the manual under ‘Apocalypse, Zombie’?”
“No, I don’t think that infinite zombies typing would eventually produce the complete works of George Romero.”
Puh! Air is getting heavy, better open a window.
Look at the friendly townspeople coming over to gree……ROLL ‘EM UP!!!
“Waldo never had a chance.”
Is this VIP parking for the Zombies concert?
Lopping their heads off doesn’t seem to slow them much so now I just keep the windows up. Much easier this way!
1. “man am i glad you talked me into this taxi costume!”
2. and this, THIS is why people don’t ask for directions
That’s a nice welcoming party! Told you people will miss us after a 28 days vacation.
Wow! The last time I saw a brood of zombie chickens like this, I was a stunt double in “Night of the Living Dead.”
Or
Hold on to you tail-feathers…things may get chick-a-fied!
Or
Awww, cluck! Obviously they can smell our small brains. Quick, stop thinking!
Or
Damn mutant zombies! Every Halloween it’s the same thing. I bet our brains don’t even taste like chicken.
Cluck all you want, guys. The ad says there’s breasts.
Darling! They are inviting me to be their 7 billionth member!
“See, this is what happens every time the Cardinals win a World Series!”
There’s never any parking at the cemetery.
I don’t think they’re here for candy…
Aren’t you suposed to say…SURPRIIIIIISE?!!!
Well?!are you going to eat us or are you just standing there?!!!
Little less conversation a little more action please…
Look into my eyes…you’re getting very sleepy…
For the last time…I don’t wanna be your leader…
License and registration?!Aren’t you suposed to say…BRAINS or This is THRILLER or something lime that?!!!
It wasn’t me it was the unarmed man!
Hon, wha’s goin’ on? Go ax that dude!
Best. Zombie Walk. Ever!
Excuse me, is this the road to the genetics lab?
OK, Martha. You win. Next time I will ask for directions.
Excuse me, how do you make your eyes do that?
“CHICKEN: you will experience Great Challenges”… so the Horoscope was FINALLY true, ¡¡HA!!
“Your Horoscope for today. CHICKEN: you will experience Great Challenges”… so the Horoscope was FINALLY true, ¡¡HA!!
“Honey, I thought you were the chick-eater”
or
“Oh here they come
They’re chick-eaters “
No, I don’t know the ‘Braaaiiiiins’ song. Groan a few bars and I’ll fake it.
When you said you wanted me for dinner, I didn’t know you wanted ME for dinner.
or
Thanks for having me for dinner.
“Yes, I know you wanted the hybrid version to appeal to the intellectual buyer. All I’m saying is, calling it the ‘Cerebrum’, and launching it at Halloween, maybe wasn’t the brightest idea you ever had, OK?”
It’s the 5k Zombie crawl. We’ll just have to wait it out.
…or 5k Zombie stagger. 😉
How do I know they’re Zombies? It’s not brain surgery! …well not exactly.
I am a little worried. They’re all wearing ‘I “heart” brains’ t-shirts.
Let’s go see the Zombie migration, you said.
Next year I’m picking the vacation.
No we’re not taking it home. I don’t care if it does have puppy dog eyes.
Get a life!
Now I know why the sign said ‘keep all hands, arms and Heads inside the car’.
I read that Zombies only crave human flesh. I hope these guys know that.
You say you want what? I don’t think so. I just had my hair done and you’re not mussing it!
You think you’re getting my brains, huh? You and what army? Oh! That army!
Uncle Fester, thanks for inviting me to the picnic. I didn’t know you had so many friends.
Where’s the food?
Don’t look at me. I only brought the plastic forks and knives.
When I asked if I should bring anything, they said: “Just bring yourself”.
Your complextion is terrible. I can recommend a good skin creme.
I can’t make out what you’re saying. Spit out that gum, please.
These ‘American Idol’ contestants are all alike.
Hell NO!!!I’m not the idiot of my brother who had the idea of the anti-zombie letter-writing campaign last year!!!
…and you thought hitchhiking couldn’t get any worst!
…is there any booze?!!!
Don’t make me angry…you wouldn’t like me when I’m ANGRY!!!
Excuse me, do you know where bat country is?
Well, at least we are NOT getting kuru…
“I told you we shouldn’t have come to the mall the day the iPhone 4s came out!”
Roll ’em up.
“What a waste it is to lose one’s mind. Or not to have a mind is being very wasteful. How true that is.” Dan Quayle for 2012
“Oh look, Honey! The dead are revolting!”
I hate Pittsburgh malls!
At last! Someone who wants me for my mind!
Yes, I am Hannibal Lecter and I’d be happy to sign my new cookbook: ‘Brains…with Fava Beans & a Nice Chianti’.
“Where’s the sarlacc when you need him?
“Brilliant Holmes! How the devil did you deduce that the missing Mensa members ended up here?”
From:’Sherlock and Watson’s Last Case’
They said they’d work for food, but this is costing me an arm and a leg.
Wow! These guys looks just as excited as we are to be at Brain-a-palooza: A Conference for People with Brains. I wonder why the flyer said BYOB!?
“How do you make these chickens un-cross the road???”
I wish I had brought my ‘she’s with stupid’ t-shirt.
Pinky and The Brain:
The Brain: “Pinky, are you thinking what I’m thinking?”
Pinky: “You’re on your own brain. Hey everyone, this guy’s name is The BRAIN, get it?
(Possibly obscure cartoon reference)
Brains, brains, brains…it’s always brains!
How about pizza for a change?
The snowbirds are coming down early this year!
What’s that smell?!
I didn’t know MENSA was having a recruiting fair…
Nope, no brains here!
I tried to tell them we were dumb birds with very small brains, but the fact that I’m driving a car gave me away.
They just got out from a Charlie Sheen concert.
The Zombies have approached us. I’m going to roll down the window and find out what they want. “Why are you grabbing my wing? Let go of my w
His last twitter. (140 characters exactly)
You’re so vain…you probably think this cartoon is about you..
I have a express delivery here for…I,M. Dinner.
…Oh, oh!
hey we are here for the brain buffet! we must be in the right place! what a happy halloween this will be!
“Where’s the beef?”
“Doug, is that you?!”
What’s the poop?
If we don’t hit it, WE’RE the poop!
Taking the Zombie toll-road was a mistake. It costs an arm and a leg.
Bwah-ha-ha! With my Zombie army behind me, I will rule the world! …if I can find my car keys.
“excuse me, have you seen a seven eleven around here?”
You might as well eat me. I didn’t win the Savage Chickens contest!
😉
“As a matter of fact, this IS the Brainmobile. Why do you ask?”
“I thought the Zombie Pub-Crawl was Saturday?”